X's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 3:46am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 4:40am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 4:21am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 5:57am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2020 @ 4:05pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 14 Feb, 2022 @ 9:45am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2020 @ 6:15am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2020 @ 2:07am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 4:00am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2020 @ 5:52am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 4:24am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2020 @ 2:10am

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 3:41am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2020 @ 5:59am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 6:03am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 5:10am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 3:40am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 5:59am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2020 @ 1:53am

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:20am

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2020 @ 6:06am

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 3 May, 2022 @ 3:22am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

0 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

2 / 30

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

0 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

4 / 30

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

411 / 1,000

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 30

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

0 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000