Santa Claus can see you while you're sleeping and he knows when you're awake, additionally he keeps tracks on whether you've been bad or good and insists you be good for "goodness" sake.

Taking all these factors into account, I feel I can confidently say Santa Claus is a fed.

So my last job was working at McDonald's, but I got sacked aye, 'caus I ah stole all the cookin' oil, poured it all over the car park mate, turnin' it into a drift ring hey. People pullin' in for Maccas didn't even know they were participatin'. Man, never seen a Camry slide like that! Straight into the lamp pole mate, it was super mad.

If you ♥♥♥♥ in the sink at exactly 4:20 am and yell “amogus” 69 times, a shadowy figure called mom will come to beat you up and you will wake up in a place called the orphanage.

...................„-~~'''''''~~--„„_
..............„-~''-,::::::::::::::::::: ''-„
..........,~''::::::::',:::::::::::::::: ::::|',
.....::::::,-~'''¯¯¯''''~~--~'''¯'''-,:|
.........'|:::::|: : : : : : : : : : : ::: : |,'
........|:::::|: : :-~~---: : : -----: |
.......(¯''~-': : : :'¯°: ',: :|: :°-: :|
.....'....''~-,|: : : : : : ~---': : : :,'
...............|,: : : : : :-~~--: : ::/ NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP
......,-''\':\: :'~„„_: : : : : _,-' NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOOOWN
__„-';;;;;\:''-,: : : :'~---~''/| NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND DESERT YOU
;;;;;/;;;;;;;\: :\: : :____/: :',__
;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',. .''-,:|:::::::|. . |;;;;''-„__
;;;;;;,;;;;;;;;;\. . .''|::::::::|. .,';;;;;;;;;;''-„
;;;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;\. . .\:::::,'. ./|;;;;;;;;;;;;;|
;;;;;;;\;;;;;;;;;;;',: : :|¯¯|. . .|;;;;;;;;;,';;|
;;;;;;;;;',;;;;;;;;;;;\. . |:::|. . .'',;;;;;;;;|;;/
;;;;;;;;;;\;;;;;;;;;;;\. .|:::|. . . |;;;;;;;;|/
;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;;;;;|. .\:/. . . .|;;;;;;;;|

💣