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Praying to God,
Asking His forgiveness,
For the Saracen blood spilt by his sword.
Next, he amazed me still further in Italy
When he saved a fatherless beauty
From the would-be ravishings
Of her dreadful Turkish uncle.
In Greece, he spent a year in silence
Just to better understand the sound of a whisper.
And so, without further gilding the lily,
And with no more ado,
I give to you the Seeker of Serenity,
The Protector of Italian Virginity,
The Enforcer of our Lord God,
The One --
The Only --
Sir Gaylord Von Switzerland!!!