Ted Cruz ate my wife. He literally just showed up at my doorstep, asked to see my wife, and vored her on the spot, then walked off. I tried to call the police but he had cut all the phone lines. I have two daughters and I don't know what will happen to them now. Will Ted Cruz come for them too? I'm on the run now. Every day when I wake I can hear Ted Cruz asking to speak with one of my children, only to discover it was a dream. If anyone knows any of Ted Cruz's weaknesses, please tell me. I've tried holy water and eating a diet solely consisting of garlic products, but I don't think it's working.