Recent reviews by Dingus Khan

STOP!!! Don't tread any further! This game is a-s-s! Never have i ever played a more unbalanced piece of garbage. Don't give this game a good review you know its bad. You only play it cause you can get your little nude mods you freaks. This game bad. Stay away.

To preface this review, I like this game. It's absolutely incredible how great this game holds up after 15 or so years. Also how it influenced third person games to come after it. But I can't for the life of me understand how it's considered the best Resident Evil game. It carries over the bare minimum to be called a RE game such as the typewriter, Leon, and the RE name. Other than that it's just an action horror game. It didn't feel like the survival horror that was RE1, 2 and 3. Granted I did play RE 2 and RE 3 Remakes beforehand but I knew to limit my expectations going into this game since it obviously wasn't going to have the polish of the newer games. But after beating the game I felt like I just finished a Metal Gear game rather than a resident evil game.

To simplify my thoughts on this game, my main issue is the story, dialogue and atmosphere of this game not fitting with the the earlier entries in the series. The gameplay is still fun and engaging even if it gets repetitive in the later portions.

"This game makes you wish for a nuclear winter" - David Donkleburg, b76c

I can't believe I've put so many hours into this game! A dear boobala gave it to me for free and I actually played it and to my surprise I liked some of it. But that is no excuse for how much of a cash grab this game was and still is!

The beginning of the game is just as boring and tedious as it was when it first released. The fetch quest after fetch quest approach didn't work well in fallout 4 and doubly so in fallout 76. The start of the game is so slow you'll want to replace your eyes with your ears like you were Mr. Potato Head.
But once you finally reach level 50 the game actually tricks you into thinking it is actually going to get good because you can do some cool ♥♥♥♥ like join the enclave and launch nukes on unsuspecting B.E.T.A Males or to spawn the Scorch Beast Queen and Wendigo Colossus to farm legendary gear. However once you've done that twenty or so times to fun of it fades and the only reason you're even doing it is to get a legendary which may or may not be something of value (99% never anything of value). Speaking of legendaries, which brain dead monkey ♥♥♥♥ at Bethesda thought it was a good idea to have a completely random drop chance on weapons and their effects when there are so many weapons and armor pieces. Like seriously the amount of 1 star brass knuckles I've gotten off of 3 star enemies is unbelievable! If they actually cared (I know they don't) they would find a way to give you a guaranteed 3 star items other than a stupid rat that swindles you out of scrip.
The cardinal sin of this game is that Bethesda is so desperate for people to play their game daily that they placed daily caps on the amount of in game currency (ie; scrip,caps, bullion, reputation sort of) so players are forced to come back daily if they want to maximize what they can earn. The main problem is bullion, while you can farm as many treasury notes as you want per day you can only turn in 20 a day which equates to 200 bullion making the progress toward the items you want to buy very slow. BUT WAIT if you want to buy the coolest things like the Gauss shotgun, minigun, or ammo machine you have to grind faction reputation. This can only be done by completing daily missions which you only get one for each faction a day that really gives you any rep and a a secondary mission that rewards a small extra bit of rep. Other than those you have to grind random encounters which if you do good luck because the reputation gain is so small it would take hours of grinding to even equal to the dailies.

To sum up this rant, while Bethesda has fixed a lot of problems since the game released it still is a scummy broken cash grab at heart that somehow even after 2 years of bullshitting its way through it somehow still has a thriving player base of dumb dumbs including yours truly playing it. I hope that Bethesda releases a true fallout game again someday but as it looks now with the huge player base and probably thousands of dollars spent in the atom shop per day that wont be for a while or ever :'(

2 Steaming Dumpaloos piles/10
P.S If you see Indiana ducky in game tell him his house looks like doodoo cheese!!!

" Wah, Wah, Wah, Monkey bars ruin every about this game! Wah. wah, I'm too cross eyed to use any other weapon in the game so I constantly have to use the chainsaw. Wah"

But in all seriousness this game takes everything about DOOM 2016 and makes it better. Sure they slowed down the walking speed to add the dash but it's easy to get used too. Each weapon is useful in it's own way and varies the gameplay. The enemy types flavor up the combat enough to keep you on your feet. The bosses feel unique in their first encounters then they're randomly thrown into different parts of the game to throw you off. The level design is really unique and the collectibles are super cool! Plus you get a special surprise after collecting all of them! Make sure on your on your first playthrough you play the slayer gates they are a great challenge!

The only thing I didn't like was how much the maurader slowed down the gameplay, but after more playthroughs I got the hang of them though I think they could have been made better!

All in all the game is great and although I don't see people crying over monkey bars and low ammo counts anymore the first couple of days after release the reviews were filled with a bunch of whiney turds who couldn't handle a minor difficulty spike alalalaala

10 Dunkleburgs /10 big cheese

Oh where to begin!? This game is so great! I have have so many good things to share about it! It has some really nice graphics compared to the old one. Aaaaaaand that's where the good stops.

Look I love starting my game up every time to find my settings reset just as much as I love a good gaper but there's a limit. Also don't get me started on how bad the loot drop rates were skewered I mean seriously? Two legendarys in a playthrough? Cm'om gearbox!

Then they somehow managed to break an already decent Co-op. I could not play for 5 minutes in my friends game without lagging all over the place like I was inside an infected colon. Even when everything was going alright I would get disconnected from the game like i was antman getting snapped out of Thanos's bunghole.

Finally, and this is the cardinal sin! Randy PringleDork promised that the final boss fight would be changed. I would have been okay with all of the other problems if this was true! But Randy Pitchfork told a half truth here boys,girls and necromorphs,The Final boss sh*ts out a f*ucking chest

No changes otherwise!
In summary, this version sucks, at this point there are no patches to fix it and i doubt it will come anytime soon.
1 dumpaloo /10

After playing through the other games in the series (excluding the reboot) I can say that DMC 5 is definitely worth full price! The story is alright but is rushed towards the end. I'd say DMC 3 still has the better one. The gameplay however is the best it's ever been!

I recommend you play the previous ones beforehand, however there is a video that explains everything pretty well if you don't care to play the others.

9 Dumpaloos/10

Alalalala

When this game came out I loved the idea of a tactical squad based shooter but sadly this game was not it. Even after the game turned into what it is I still had loads of fun. But now I can't get into a game with out g-fuel junkies spamming the crouch button and duck, dodge and weaving all around the map. And don't get me started on the community! Majority of the people you find on this game haven't left their deep dark holes in years and constantly shout at you or harass you in the text chat if you don't play exactly to the standard that is set by their twitch streaming idols.
This game is fun at times ( minus the broken operators that are released every couple of months or so) but the game is at an all time high in toxicity that will turn off more casual gamers and newcomers.
When you get into a good match with decent people on your team this game is really fun, but I'm telling you when it's bad, it's really bad.

I give this game a
Steaming pile of Dumpaloo/10

This Game is one of the most immersive games of all time!!!!!! From the stellar driving which rivals that of GTA and Forza, the terrifying horror that trumps games such as Outlast and Alien:Isolation. This game is the pinnacle of Survival horror with little to no flaws. I've yet to find a game that comes close to this spectacle. I recommend this game wholeheartedly!!!!

19 pigeons in a coop/10
or for a simpler rating scale
Dumpaloo/10

I like the series, however in one of the early cutscenes the game crashes no matter what.

Dumpaloo/10

The Main story is very short if you only play that and that alone. But where this game really excels is when you take the time to explore and do the side quests as they come. It really gets you involved in the city and helps you feel more immersed in the story.

The only real flaw with this game is how bad it can run sometimes but other than that it is a great game. Definintely pick this up on sale its only $5.