Dashing through the sand
with a bomb strapped to my back.
I have a nasty plan
for Christmas in Iraq.

I got through checkpoint A,
but not through checkpoint B.
That's when I got shot in the ass
by the US Military

Ooh, jingle bombs, jingle bombs
Mine blew up you see.
Where are all the virgins
that Bin Laden promised me?

Ooh, jingle bombs, jingle bombs
U.S. soldiers shot me dead.
The only thing that I have left
is this towel up on my head.

I used to be a man,
but every time I cough,
thanks to Uncle Sam,
my nuts keep falling off.

(Don't look you pervert!)

My bombing days are done.
I need to find some work.
Perhaps it would be much safer
as a convenient store night clerk.

Oooh, jingle bombs, jingle bombs
I think I got screwed.
Dont laugh at me because I'm dead
or Ill kill you

Got my dog and a six pack inside my truck
My wife rides in the back because she won't shut up
There's a deer in the headlights though it might be a sin
I gunned the motor and run over him

It's a road kill Christmas
Venice that's pretenderized
It's a road kill Christmas
Cause they freeze when the light hits their eyes

By the time we got home he was her pet
That night he slept on my side of the bed
I had to spend the night out in my truck
But I had some beer so I didn't give a darn

A couple days later I made him a deal
If he worked for me then he won't be my next meal
I covered his antlers with foil and then
I plugged the T. V. Cable into his rear end

It's a road kill Christmas
That dumb deer changed my life
It's a road kill Christmas
Next time I'll run over my wife

LOL

TowerControl = Clinton

HI