holy providence
<3   Kunitachi, Tokyo, Japan
Level
15
Collection Agent
262 XP
 
 
I swear to God I want to just slit my wrists and end this bull$hit
Throw the Magnum to my head, threaten to pull $hit
And squeeze until the bed's completely red
I'm glad I'm dead, a worthless fuсkin' buddha head
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osu! -rhythm is just a click away
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castle with the cobwebs
One, two, three, four

Why am I so nauseous, I don't get it, what's the deal?
I can only see my hands, my vision's ♥♥♥♥♥♥, is this for real?
You're the only person living that I trust to guide me home
Is this blood inside my skin? Am I decaying to the bone?

Do what you have to, do what you need
I'll be right beside you like you were for me
I'm sorry I hurt you, I'm trying to be
Who you really need now, I'm trying to be
You gave me your heart now, it's easy to see
You needed a castle somewhere to sleep
I'm not like your ex, I don't expect you to leave, but
Go if you find somebody better than me

You needed a castle, you needed a friend
You wanted a sword, you needed things to protect
You act like you're happy when you're really depressed
I get why you do that, we all like to pretend

Do what you have to, do what you need
I'll be right beside you like you were for me
I'm sorry I hurt you, I'm trying to be
Who you really need now, I'm trying to be
You gave me your heart now, it's easy to see
You needed a castle somewhere to sleep
I'm not like your ex, I don't expect you to leave, but
Go if you find somebody better than me
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last played on 17 Jul
Company of Heroes 2
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Comments
holy providence 5 Jan @ 10:21am 
You can't be in my shoes, you would kill yourself
It's okay, I'm alright, but I need some help
Suicide on my mind, I can't even lie
All because of stupid ♥♥♥♥♥, wanna waste my time
holy providence 5 Jan @ 10:16am 
Tell my why I'm cryin'
All the time
If I say I'm fine, know I'm lyin'
Damn I feel like dyin'
Cause you're not around
And girl you got me tweakin'
Got me looking like a clown

♥♥♥♥, ♥♥♥♥, ♥♥♥♥, ♥♥♥♥
Feel like Lil Peep
R.I.P. in the benz truck
Everywhere I go, I see frowns
They just mean muggin'
I don't know why
They be showin', all this fake love
I am just a freak
You should not love me
I don't wanna be here
Nothin' here for me
Hennessy, Hennessy on my jeans, yeah
I see you every night, in my dreams
In your bed, do you still think of me?
I can't sleep, every mornin' I feel weak
I can't go outside, I can barely even think
I don't wanna die, I don't want anxiety
holy providence 5 Jan @ 10:14am 
♥♥♥♥♥ I'm sick and tired
Of feeling sick and tired
Losing my mind and I never really smile
Haven't heard your voice in a very long while
I been looking for you I been searching for miles
holy providence 10 Nov, 2023 @ 2:59pm 
Everyday
Feel the same
Existential dread got me in waves
Break the lane
I can’t relate
To all you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ fakes
I feel like I’m alone today
So I just sit down and create
Distracting me from all the pain
♥♥♥♥♥ this my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ therapy
I cut my face it doesn't matter
Frеsh meat served on a plattеr
Kill me while there's some laughter
Don't make me start again
Don't make me start again
This ♥♥♥♥♥ is not my friend
And time and time again
And I forget who I am
I don't have a real name
And neither do you
All creation
Will end soon too
Will end soon too
Like me and you
I'm such a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ fool
For falling for you
holy providence 10 Nov, 2023 @ 2:54pm 
Прошли дожди, снегопад пришёл
Хочу стоять под твоим окном инеем, рисуя на стекле узор
Я не знаю проснусь ли когда-нибудь, я вогнал себя сам в криогенный сон
Куда бы я не пошёл — эта вьюга идёт по пятам за мной
holy providence 10 Nov, 2023 @ 2:52pm 
Looking up for a star
Can't get that
I had love in my heart
Tryna get back
Told me I was a problem then sit back
Guess we gon see in the end
Im never leaving again
Im finna build it to rise
Then do it over again
Until the world feel alive
I got it all in my head
Im tired of taking my time
I’ll do this ♥♥♥♥ till im dead
A lion killing his pride
I feel the illest alive
I feel adrenaline pump
I think it might be the product of never having enough
Of never feeling that touch
Of never taking it back
Of living stuck in my head
I know I’m living with that

Alone in my mind
I feel you breathing
I don’t
Don’t know why
I feel this every night

I know you need time
That’s why you leaving
Paint me all your lies
Like I was ready to die