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R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Ontgrendeld op 13 dec 2013 om 22:34

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Ontgrendeld op 13 dec 2013 om 22:43

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.
Ontgrendeld op 13 dec 2013 om 22:37

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 13:02

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Ontgrendeld op 13 dec 2013 om 22:35

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Ontgrendeld op 23 dec 2013 om 0:50

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.
Ontgrendeld op 15 dec 2013 om 9:07

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.
Ontgrendeld op 17 dec 2013 om 6:31

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.
Ontgrendeld op 17 dec 2013 om 7:11

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 7:45

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 8:33

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.
Ontgrendeld op 22 dec 2013 om 7:50

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Ontgrendeld op 23 dec 2013 om 1:21

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 12:46

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.
Ontgrendeld op 18 aug 2014 om 14:05

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 8:25

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.
Ontgrendeld op 23 dec 2013 om 0:59

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 8:45

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 12:42

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Ontgrendeld op 19 dec 2013 om 8:10

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Ontgrendeld op 17 aug 2014 om 5:40

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 13:21

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Ontgrendeld op 14 dec 2013 om 1:39

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Ontgrendeld op 21 dec 2013 om 13:46

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.
Ontgrendeld op 21 dec 2013 om 14:33

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 12:29

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 12:08

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 7:56

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Ontgrendeld op 22 dec 2013 om 8:01

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Ontgrendeld op 18 aug 2014 om 14:07

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Ontgrendeld op 19 dec 2013 om 7:09

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 8:24

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Ontgrendeld op 22 dec 2013 om 7:56

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Ontgrendeld op 9 aug 2014 om 16:35

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Ontgrendeld op 9 aug 2014 om 16:35

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Ontgrendeld op 9 aug 2014 om 16:46

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Ontgrendeld op 23 aug 2014 om 7:45

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.
Ontgrendeld op 29 sep 2014 om 11:14

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 12:09

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 9:19

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 7:26

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Ontgrendeld op 17 dec 2013 om 6:45

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Ontgrendeld op 22 dec 2013 om 7:34

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Ontgrendeld op 22 dec 2013 om 7:23

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 13:04

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Ontgrendeld op 19 dec 2013 om 7:43

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 7:46

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Ontgrendeld op 15 dec 2013 om 8:54

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Ontgrendeld op 15 dec 2013 om 9:10

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Ontgrendeld op 9 aug 2014 om 17:14

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.
Ontgrendeld op 13 dec 2013 om 22:30

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.
Ontgrendeld op 13 dec 2013 om 22:45

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 8:48

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Ontgrendeld op 15 dec 2013 om 9:10

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.
Ontgrendeld op 17 aug 2014 om 5:53

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Ontgrendeld op 19 dec 2013 om 7:51

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Ontgrendeld op 13 aug 2014 om 14:58

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 7:56

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Ontgrendeld op 19 dec 2013 om 7:44

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.
Ontgrendeld op 20 dec 2013 om 12:26

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Ontgrendeld op 13 dec 2013 om 22:44

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Ontgrendeld op 19 dec 2013 om 8:07

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 13:25

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Ontgrendeld op 18 dec 2013 om 13:08

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.
Ontgrendeld op 18 aug 2014 om 13:58

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Ontgrendeld op 19 dec 2013 om 7:34

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Ontgrendeld op 13 aug 2014 om 16:17

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.
Ontgrendeld op 23 dec 2013 om 1:22

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 1:54

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 9:26

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.
Ontgrendeld op 5 nov 2015 om 14:21

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Ontgrendeld op 5 nov 2015 om 16:06

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.
Ontgrendeld op 6 nov 2015 om 3:35

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.
Ontgrendeld op 6 nov 2015 om 4:03

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.
Ontgrendeld op 6 nov 2015 om 4:13

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Ontgrendeld op 6 nov 2015 om 3:57

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 1:32

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 8:24

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 8:17

Hobo Sexual

Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward.
Ontgrendeld op 5 nov 2015 om 9:49

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.
Ontgrendeld op 5 nov 2015 om 10:04

Ode to Eddings

Deactivated all of the Vend-A-Cure XJ-2 units.
Ontgrendeld op 5 nov 2015 om 15:32

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.
Ontgrendeld op 5 nov 2015 om 14:19

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 8:15

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 8:49

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 9:12

You Snow Nothing John Blow

Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Ontgrendeld op 5 nov 2015 om 10:36

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.
Ontgrendeld op 4 nov 2015 om 8:47

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!
Ontgrendeld op 3 mrt 2018 om 9:21