Ladies an gentlemen, certain allegations have come to my attention. Some Snoops detractors think I hack in Team Fortress 2 and even that at one point I led a nefarious group known as "The Snoops Crew" which headed a disgusting movement called The Team Fortress Second Reich or commonly communicated as "TF2nd Reich" among the alt-right. Among the most egregious accusations is simply that I am "Hitlers top guy". I am here today to explain myself and prove my innocence using facts and logic.

For my first argument you must simply know a bit of real history. In 1826 French author Anthelme Brillat-Savarin released a legendary work known as "Physiologie du Gout, ou Medetations de Gastronomie Transcendante". Within this work the legendary phrase finds its origin: “Tell me what you eat and I will tell you what your are.” (translated from french). As you might be able to tell this phrase eventually shortened to the golden rule we know in the west, "you are what you eat". This brings me to my second point of this first argument. On February 4th 2006 I kidnapped, killed, and ate a 14 year old child I found running away from home off a freeway near the border of new mexico. This child had none of the features I have been accused of and although their disappearance was never solved, this child also did not commit the act. If you are what you eat and I ate this child then it follows naturally that I retain that same childs innocence.

For my second argument consider this. If the courts find me guilty of the accusations, I will shoot myself in the head using my Walther PPK 7.65 in a bunker on April 30th 1945.

Well folks, this is it. Automation replaced us and now our meaningless lives will be cut short by Russian firebombs. I don't live in Ukraine but lets be realistic here, Joeys definitely gonna fuck this one up. However I should insist upon thee weary and panicked masses to not fret for from the ashes and embers of our corpses humanity will be forged anew, stronger and more resilient than ever before, like a cockroach or my raging anti-semitism.

Point is, make peace with your gods. Unless you're an atheist, then make peace with your science or something. WW3 is on the horizon and sure a complete nuclear holocaust of humanity seems bad but think about the silver lining. The corrupt and oppressive western power structures will erode meaning you will finally reclaim your human rights and now when people want to take them from you, you can just shoot them. The disasters of over socialization will be undone and instead of being subjected to social hierarchy's in order to live you can just scavenge like you were meant to, independently and with your own skills. Best of all, jews are gonna find it a lot harder to hold the holocaust over your head and guilt trip you when everyone has been through nuclear fallout, WW2 will be yesterdays news.

Anyways, if any of you guys have some guns and ammunition can I please have them.

Back in my day we did our edgy hacking by hand. There were only maybe 2 edgy hackers per game unless you bring your posse. Us edgy hackers have finally been replaced by automation and now every game has at least 6 automated hacking bots.

Now you can't even display your script kiddie powers without those literal kiddies saying you are an automated machine. Fucking millennials ruin everything.

KILL YOURSELF. You're making the world a terrible place to be in.

Negros beware, spics run and hide, because the south will rise and they'll all die. Abolishing slavery was a mistake and those who disagree are mistakes as well.