REPENT! REPENT THOU SINS! PRAISE THE BALL!

Extract from the Holy Biball: In the beginning, there were two dimensions of the Realm. God, hallowed be his name and glorious be his presence, created the third dimension of width, and lo and behold, shapes of all persuasions burst forth from his loins and filled the universe, and the people rejoiced and partook in the great orgy of the third dimension. God in all his might and glory was pleased with his creations and filled the universe with light and warmth, thus the people could see where they were thrusting thier instruments. God witnessed the people using the cubes, and the prisms, and the squiggles, and the various polygons to build thier homes and penetrate themselves, and witnessed the great suffering of corners unto rectum. Thus God, in all his might and glory, created the Ball, and with his great power molded the holy ball into all manner of single-sided shapes. he blessed it unto the people, thus preventing further rectal damage and birthing the great Saint to watch over them, Brother Ball. Amen.

In this institution, we worship the one true holy spirit, the Ball. Abandon thou religion and join us if thou wish to ascend to true godhood.

Group Goals
50 members Complete
100 members Complete
250 members
500 members
1000 members (This is the ultimate goal of the Church, once met, the planets will align and the God of Balls will descend upon the earth and spake unto us, 'Good Job maties.'

The Clergy:

Archbishop: Brother Ball
Bishop: Father Orb
Saint of the Secular Sphericals: Saint Sphere
Single-sided discoverer of the holy Ball: Orbicular Globule
Pilgrim of the Eastern European sect of Ballism: Deus Ball
Martyr and discoverer of the sacred, roundest sphere on earth: Martyr droplet
Head torturer and inquisitor in the dungeon of Spheres: Ball Inquisitor

Other prestigious parish members:
He who volunteered himself to venture out into the strange, fortold land of Discord, in order to establish a glorious parish: Mr Clipboard
He who shows faithful dedication to the cause, and should be revered for this: Daddy Framed
He who is a ferverent and proud supporter of the faith: koolgoose
He who is himself a Ball, and thus embodies the Holy spirit of Ballism: Steve the Ball

HERETICS: She who consorts with and spies on behalf of the Polygonal Church: DynamicDragon
He who doth blaspheme against the Clergy: Colonel Porpoise

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Happy Orb day

2020년 5월 18일 - Orb | 댓글 1개

i have no idea why i'm announcing this this group is beyond dead but i just noticed what day it is.

We must be vigilant

2018년 2월 17일 - Brother Ball | 댓글 0개

My brothers and sisters, Ball is displeased. Our lack of activity and devotion, due in part to the blasphemous decisions made by Valve to disallow the recruitment of new members, has had dire consequences. The great Orb on which we reside, Earth, has decided to quake in response to our sins.

Many members of the clergy were affected by this, as it caused minor inconveniences to our lives, such as knocking over small objects, or making us say "Was that a tremor?" before going back to doing nothing. Even Saint Sphere was affected in the most horrific manner, as his beverage was spilled and his mother was displeased.

This is an urgent and dire situation in serious need of remedy. So remember, thou must showeth thy dedication, thou must pray, thou must not defile or disrespect the power of Balls.

Amen, and godspeed brothers.

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PhantomRaptor 2019년 2월 14일 오후 1시 01분

yeet

2017년 10월 9일 오전 9시 26분

Wonderful Ducktor Quack, you are now on the road to enlightenment. Praise the ball and your true calling will emerge.

Wardrobe Hazard 2017년 10월 9일 오전 8시 19분

I have joined

Brother Ball

2017년 7월 4일 오전 8시 29분

Steve the Ball, do not fear, for if these men consort with the Polygons, they are dooming themselves to an eternity of damnation. We see the light, we know the truth. And Asianfighter, have faith, for many of us do think about cubes. They are unfortunately a common occurence in our existence, a constant reminder of the true power of the Balls.