Big Boss didn’t go through two comas and a Phantom Pain to be turned into your glorified smoke machine. You’re sitting there abusing the Phantom Cigar because you’re scared of a little sunshine. What’s next, D-Horse wearing SPF 50?

Let me guess—you light up the Phantom Cigar because you “need to scout the area” or “wait for the perfect time to strike.” Newsflash: enemy guards don’t go home at night. They’re always there. Man up and infiltrate already.

Unequip the Phantom Cigar. No, seriously. Take it out of your loadout. Now you can’t chain-smoke even if you want to. Big Boss can’t rely on a crutch, and neither can you. Do you see Ocelot sucking on cigars every five minutes? No. Because he’s busy being cool.

You’re not smoking to skip time. You’re smoking because you want to feel like the badass Big Boss. But guess what? You’re not him. He’s pixel-perfect; you’re just a guy with too much time and not enough skill.

Quit smoking because you look pathetic every time you light up that Phantom Cigar to avoid playing the game properly. Be the Big Boss you want to see in the world. Or don’t. Whatever.