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ttt_blarkmersa

Absolutely zero relation to Black Mesa! Our legal team can and will sue you!

We are the founding pioneers of slightly game-nudging creations such as the Anti-Murder Whatchamacallit! *Functional after several incidents

Because we value the preservation of life, and a recent.. failure to operate a similar machine, the A.M.W. instructions are as follows:
1. Stand on the center of the machines base.
2. Wait for your local security officer to activate the rotors.
3. Once it is fully powered, your local security officer will activate the machine and see the results.
Disclaimer: The AMW is prone to unintentional melon related spontaneous teleportation.

Or, alternatively, the Melon Core! Turning the power of melonocity and the rage of a contained powerful beast into enough energy to power entire nations! For us. You don't get any.

Our guard force understands the power of true comradery and cooperation! Also, they won't tolerate your ♥♥♥♥. Behave.

Down in the underground facility (please wait for admission from the security office, stop killing our secretaries), we have many wonderful amenities and jobs!

In the security office, our guards are doing their proud duty containing the zombies and some disheveled old guy we found on the jail floor. They monitor the whole facility from there, and have a whole armory to enforce the rules with!

Take a trip on down to the lounge with our beautiful outside views and cozy fireplace! We also have plenty of food, so stop stealing the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ lunches from the workers. How would you feel if someone stole your lunch?

In R&D, our finest most qualified scientists are spending their days making excel spreadsheets! Our researchers on the other hand are investigating and experimenting on the finest new Meloncells™ to power our Melon Core! For legal reasons, we have to warn you they are highly explosive.

Finally we have the control room! Here, we monitor the Melon Core's power and ensure no one has sabotaged the core. Again. We still have no clue what this thing can do! For all we know it could kill us all!

Thank you for visiting Blark Mersa! You are not invited, have no credentials, but with the godlike power you hold, we cant really say no! Don't let the door hit you on the way out!
(Disclaimer: Blark Mersa primarily uses blast doors, the "door hitting you on the way out" would be fatal blunt trauma)