El Chumbo » Games » POSTAL 2 Stats

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83 of 89 (93%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Unlocked 16 Feb, 2020 @ 9:12am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2020 @ 9:22pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2020 @ 8:37pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Unlocked 16 Feb, 2020 @ 10:51am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Unlocked 16 Feb, 2020 @ 10:29am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Unlocked 8 Mar, 2020 @ 9:20am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2020 @ 1:50pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 8:54am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.
Unlocked 2 Mar, 2020 @ 5:18pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.
Unlocked 3 Mar, 2020 @ 4:51pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.
Unlocked 7 Mar, 2020 @ 7:52am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.
Unlocked 9 Mar, 2020 @ 7:28am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Unlocked 22 Mar, 2020 @ 12:56pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 9:15am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 4:29pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.
Unlocked 24 Feb, 2020 @ 10:52am

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.
Unlocked 15 Jun, 2021 @ 10:56am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Unlocked 3 Mar, 2020 @ 2:43pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Unlocked 23 Feb, 2020 @ 7:22pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Unlocked 6 Mar, 2020 @ 7:54pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Unlocked 1 Mar, 2020 @ 8:05pm

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Unlocked 23 Feb, 2020 @ 6:33pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 6:07pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 8:33am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.
Unlocked 26 Feb, 2020 @ 7:00pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Unlocked 23 Feb, 2020 @ 6:21pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Unlocked 10 Jun, 2021 @ 10:42pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 4:40pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 8:27am

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Unlocked 3 Mar, 2020 @ 3:54pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 5:45pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Unlocked 3 Mar, 2020 @ 4:21pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Unlocked 22 Mar, 2020 @ 12:51pm

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.
Unlocked 19 Jun, 2021 @ 2:23pm

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
Unlocked 20 Jun, 2021 @ 4:11pm

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)
Unlocked 19 Jun, 2021 @ 3:21pm

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.
Unlocked 22 Mar, 2020 @ 12:59pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Unlocked 10 Jun, 2021 @ 10:53pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2020 @ 8:37pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Unlocked 3 Mar, 2020 @ 3:06pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2020 @ 8:39pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Unlocked 23 Feb, 2020 @ 7:07pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Unlocked 8 Mar, 2020 @ 9:28am

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 6:01pm

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2020 @ 9:17pm

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.
Unlocked 3 Mar, 2020 @ 4:53pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Unlocked 23 Feb, 2020 @ 6:40pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2020 @ 1:54pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2020 @ 2:03pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2020 @ 8:39pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2020 @ 9:15pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2020 @ 8:39pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2020 @ 2:05pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.
Unlocked 1 Mar, 2020 @ 7:45pm

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2020 @ 1:58pm

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Unlocked 15 Jun, 2021 @ 10:08am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 8:31am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Unlocked 16 Feb, 2020 @ 9:00am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2020 @ 1:58pm

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2020 @ 1:40pm

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Unlocked 6 Mar, 2020 @ 8:12pm

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Unlocked 26 Feb, 2020 @ 6:08pm

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Unlocked 26 Feb, 2020 @ 7:43pm

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 4:51pm

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.
Unlocked 7 Mar, 2020 @ 7:32am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Unlocked 2 Mar, 2020 @ 5:25pm

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.
Unlocked 22 Mar, 2020 @ 12:59pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.
Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 7:08pm

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.
Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 10:30pm

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.
Unlocked 4 Dec, 2022 @ 10:14am

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Unlocked 8 Dec, 2022 @ 6:39pm

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.
Unlocked 6 Aug, 2023 @ 7:38am

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.
Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 6:58pm

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.
Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 7:36pm

Hobo Sexual

Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward.
Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 11:46pm

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.
Unlocked 4 Dec, 2022 @ 8:44am

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.
Unlocked 4 Dec, 2022 @ 10:09am

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 10:58pm

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.
Unlocked 8 Dec, 2022 @ 5:12pm

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Unlocked 5 Dec, 2022 @ 7:04pm

You Snow Nothing John Blow

Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Unlocked 4 Dec, 2022 @ 9:03am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.
Unlocked 25 Feb, 2020 @ 8:38am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!
Unlocked 19 Jun, 2021 @ 9:39am



Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
+1

1 hidden achievement remaining

Details for each achievement will be revealed once unlocked