Me: Do you have this plane?
Friend: Yes, its pretty nice.
Me: Buys plane.
Me: (doesn't speak French) what does any of this mean?
Friend: No clue.
Me: How do you start it?
Friend: No clue.
Me: begins looking at french Mirage 2000c manuals.
5 minutes later
accidentally ejects on runway

12/10 would yeet seat again

As a business stockholder business-business man, I was disapointed to find out I had payed extra to throw inflatable waifu baits. My rage unmatched, I was ready to destroy society and rip it a new one.

Then the aliens showed up, and my status as Civilian caused me to be drafted into the weary armed forces.
I was given the important job of holding a laser pointer so the airforce could land their bombs, not sure how a red dot on the face of a giant spider helped but they kept telling me I was the best warfighter they ever met, possibly even in history.

I was given co-command of a small squad, and with only my 6 men we routed the invaders, the city was saved, but humanity would never be the same.


Then the blue light hit, and in an instant, a city was leveled.

My weapon had malfunction due to hacking in more ammo, the up side my weapon was devastating the bug menace, the downside my friend had to watch and scream in terror as my weapon left a city more devastated than a nuclear blast may have as he ran to a helicopter for safety.


Anyway, I hacked all the achievements for this ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, its a mess, drink some alcohol before playing with friends for maximum effect.