I remember when I met this chick. She was standing outside of a Leekers Grocery store wearing nothing but flip flops, smoking a cigarette.. She then proceeded to beg passers by to let her wash their phone screens with her clappers. No one has seen her since.

Last weekend this guy texted me the schedule for all of CBS's night time programming. I can't read.

I overheard this guy Christmas caroling through my neighborhood last week (I’m very wealthy, I don’t know how he got through the gate) and the only words he sang were „scram“ and „Jewish folk“. So he was singing jingle bells but it definitely did not sound right.

I heard this guy is packing a doctors office in her pants.

Wow does this guy hang dong or what… I was standing outside this guys doctors office when he was getting his schlamadingo checked out, and I heard the doctor say “stop listening in on my appointments you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ weirdo”. Kind of weird thing to say to a man’s penis but he wouldn’t have said that if this guy wasn’t packing I know that fr fr though.