DΞVK!t » Games » POSTAL 2 Stats

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78 of 89 (88%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.
Unlocked 22 Jan, 2018 @ 6:34am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2017 @ 11:25am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.
Unlocked 20 Feb, 2017 @ 11:38am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.
Unlocked 2 May, 2022 @ 12:00pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 11:59am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.
Unlocked 11 Dec, 2022 @ 10:40am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 5:29am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 11:22pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.
Unlocked 29 Dec, 2018 @ 11:01am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.
Unlocked 1 Jan, 2019 @ 3:07am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.
Unlocked 6 Jan, 2019 @ 7:53am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.
Unlocked 19 Jan, 2019 @ 8:07am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.
Unlocked 29 Jan, 2019 @ 12:47am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.
Unlocked 1 Mar, 2020 @ 1:59am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 1:11pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.
Unlocked 29 Dec, 2018 @ 7:51am

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.
Unlocked 20 Oct, 2019 @ 12:43pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.
Unlocked 19 Jan, 2019 @ 7:16am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.
Unlocked 20 Nov, 2022 @ 10:08am

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.
Unlocked 20 Oct, 2019 @ 12:20pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.
Unlocked 29 Dec, 2018 @ 8:18am

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.
Unlocked 1 Mar, 2020 @ 6:58am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.
Unlocked 19 Jul, 2019 @ 8:58am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.
Unlocked 29 Dec, 2018 @ 11:21am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 11:31pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 11:50am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.
Unlocked 27 Dec, 2018 @ 12:45pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.
Unlocked 15 Feb, 2017 @ 11:22am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 11:35pm

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2022 @ 11:53am

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Unlocked 19 Oct, 2019 @ 11:52am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.
Unlocked 11 Apr, 2018 @ 1:41am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.
Unlocked 5 Apr, 2020 @ 11:34am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 5:22am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.
Unlocked 20 Feb, 2017 @ 11:38am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.
Unlocked 1 Jan, 2019 @ 3:07am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 11:19pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 11:35pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.
Unlocked 21 Oct, 2019 @ 1:16pm

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.
Unlocked 20 Oct, 2019 @ 3:30am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.
Unlocked 19 Jul, 2019 @ 9:06am

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.
Unlocked 20 Oct, 2019 @ 12:16pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 4:56am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 5:31am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.
Unlocked 20 Jul, 2019 @ 1:13pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 4:43am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 1:27pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 1:10pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 5:32am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.
Unlocked 28 Dec, 2018 @ 9:44am

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.
Unlocked 1 Jan, 2019 @ 3:07am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.
Unlocked 1 Mar, 2020 @ 1:02am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.
Unlocked 29 Dec, 2018 @ 11:21am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.
Unlocked 19 Jul, 2019 @ 8:57am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.
Unlocked 7 Sep, 2020 @ 7:05am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.
Unlocked 7 Sep, 2020 @ 6:36am

SCREW that game!

Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it.
Unlocked 23 Nov, 2022 @ 11:24am

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.
Unlocked 23 Nov, 2022 @ 11:24am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.
Unlocked 2 Mar, 2020 @ 7:15am

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.
Unlocked 14 Feb, 2017 @ 4:55am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!
Unlocked 23 Nov, 2022 @ 11:24am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.
Unlocked 29 Jan, 2019 @ 12:50am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.
Unlocked 31 Jan, 2022 @ 10:14am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.
Unlocked 8 Feb, 2022 @ 12:02pm

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.
Unlocked 8 Feb, 2022 @ 2:09pm

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.
Unlocked 9 Feb, 2022 @ 12:15pm

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.
Unlocked 18 Feb, 2022 @ 11:58am

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.
Unlocked 30 Jan, 2022 @ 3:59am

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.
Unlocked 22 Jan, 2018 @ 1:11pm

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.
Unlocked 24 Mar @ 3:52pm

Hobo Sexual

Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward.
Unlocked 8 Feb, 2022 @ 1:37pm

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.
Unlocked 23 Nov, 2022 @ 11:24am

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.
Unlocked 24 Mar @ 3:52pm

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.
Unlocked 9 Feb, 2022 @ 11:51am

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.
Unlocked 2 May, 2022 @ 12:07pm

You Snow Nothing John Blow

Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone.
Unlocked 24 Mar @ 3:52pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.
Unlocked 19 Oct, 2019 @ 11:54am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!
Unlocked 1 Mar, 2020 @ 6:45am



Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)
+3

3 hidden achievements remaining

Details for each achievement will be revealed once unlocked