I didn’t know much about cops before I began dating one. Everyone in my family had taken a similar career route of business: accounting or law. In fact, I don’t think I personally knew even one police officer.

That all changed on May 4, 2012 when I went on my first date with Adam. When this 6-foot-four, dark haired, dark eyed stud told me he was a police officer, the first thought that went through my head was “...sexy.”
Now, more than two years later, I know it’s so much more than that.

Growing up, I viewed police officers as those who got the bad guys, and those who you were supposed to turn to if you needed help. They were all good guys, and they were always there to protect us. It never occurred to me that others may feel differently. I’ll never forget my first interaction with someone who did. Adam and I had been dating for over a year, and we had just moved in together the week before. I was out of town at an event for work, and someone asked me what my boyfriend did for work.

“He’s a police officer,” I said proudly as I watched her face change from inquisitive to disgusted.

“Oh. You know, I was pulled over the other month by the rudest cop. I wasn’t even doing anything wrong and he kept following me with his sirens on until I pulled over.”

I’ll never forget the feeling of defensiveness I had to stifle in order to move on from this conversation. “Of course you were doing something wrong, lady, or he wouldn’t have pulled you over,” I thought to myself.

As she walked away, I realized how bad of a reputation cops can get, and I feel it’s time I share my opinion on the matter.

Every time I hear anyone complain about cops, say they’re ‘too forceful’ or ‘too aggressive,’ a part of me hurts. Though I always had a positive view of the police, I never really understood all they go through. Yes, they chose this profession. Yes, they get paid for it. No one’s forcing them to be there (except when they literally are forced to stay overnight, when too many people called out for the midnight shift and they’ve already worked 16 hours, so really, what’s an extra eight?).

But I urge you, the next time you have a hard day at work, ask yourself: did it involve prying a hysterical child away from its drugged-out mother? Did it involve responding to yet another domestic disturbance and seeing a woman’s fresh bruises? Did it involve approaching an unfamiliar car, unsure if the driver is armed and ready to fire?

Probably not.

Simply put, Adam is the best person I know. I’ve never met someone so selfless and who willingly does so much for others before himself. He sees it as his duty to protect and serve, all hours of the day, seven days a week. It doesn’t matter if he’s on duty or in uniform; he’ll constantly be keeping an eye on the status quo wherever he is.

It wasn’t long into our relationship when I automatically began picking the seat at the restaurant table that placed my back to the door, so he could face it. Always face the door. I learned he feels naked when he doesn’t have his gun on him. I also learned it’s his, and all cops’, duty to protect and serve beyond their normal work shift. If they see something, they have to intervene. Armed or not, without their vest. Would you want your boyfriend/husband/son/father doing so without a weapon on his hip?

I learned he’ll limit his drinking so he can be the designated driver on our nights out, leaving me to happily consume all the wine I want and not have to worry about getting home safely.


I know people won’t always see what I see. I know they won’t magically change their perspective. While I don’t know what the future will bring, I do know one thing for certain: I am the luckiest girl in the world. I wouldn’t trade our lives for anything, and I will continue to be fiercely proud of my police officer every single day.