Análises recentes de Moppy

I’ve fought tooth and nail to capture 15 meters of dirt, only to lose it minutes later because someone didn’t build a bunker. I’ve waded through artillery barrages, survived grenade spam, and watched countless comrades charge valiantly into certain death all so I could run out of ammo in the middle of enemy territory.

It’s incredible how satisfying it feels to stack enough items to lag your PC

(Note: I’ve been playing Runescape for over 20 years, and I’m still early in Brighter Shores. I fully intend to update this review after logging more hours.)

I really want to like Brighter Shores- I really, really do.

There’s a nostalgia here that brings back memories of why I fell for games like Runescape years ago. But instead of feeling like something fresh and new, Brighter Shores seems stuck. It’s trying too hard to recreate the past without moving forward. It’s as if the game is clinging to Runescape’s shadow rather than building something that stands on its own.

Skills and resource management are similarly outdated. Instead of rewarding exploration or crafting in a meaningful way, the most effective way to level up is to brute-force skills by buying resources from NPCs. Gathering resources yourself feels inefficient and pointless, and with minimal inventory space, there’s constant backtracking just to store items in fragmented storage areas for each skill. This setup turns what should be a fulfilling, self-sufficient experience into a time sink of pointless running around.

But I haven’t given up. There’s a spark here, a potential waiting under the layers of outdated mechanics and rough edges, that keeps me playing. Despite my criticisms, I'm genuinely hoping Brighter Shores finds its stride. But for now, Brighter Shores feels more like a nostalgic misstep than a bold new journey.

The Witness is basically like doing legal peyote

smush bug

Be prepared for expeditions that are both quick, leisurely and equally chaotic, thankfully confined to a maximum of 30 minutes of survival against enormous circumstances. Your adventures net sheer, unadulterated chaos. And as you make your way along the perilous route, propelled by a quest-oriented meta progression, you'll discover that you keep going back, like an insane fan of self-inflicted suffering.

Halls of Torment, similar to Vampire Survivors, presents a wide feast of skills, attributes, and objects, a plentiful table where delicious synergy awaits you. Want to turn your enemies into a pile of eviscerated chum? Lay claim to a talent that explodes skulls like rotten melons. Do you wish your veins were filled with invincibility? Build a Jenga-style tower out of empowering qualities in the skill tree. The combination of the possibilities is as endless as the abyss itself.

If you've ever wanted to slap cards together like a haphazard game of 52-card pickup, while simultaneously experiencing the pleasure of a god-like village builder, then Stacklands is the tit twisting experience you've been craving.

Picture this: You've got your Villager card, you've got your Berry Bush card, and you're ready to make some ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ magic happen. You slam them together harder than your step dad tossing you around, and BAM! - an unholy orgy of Berry cards just waiting to be devoured by your ravenous subjects.

Now, if you're the kind of degenerate who loves making a quick buck, you can sell those cards for coinage like a back-alley dealer, then use your filthy lucre to buy some Card Packs, each pack just begging to be ripped open like a virgin pack of ramen. With focuses like Cooking, Farming, and Building, you'll be neck-deep in possibilities in no time.

Have you ever thought to yourself, "What if Guitar Hero and Dance Dance Revolution had a baby, and that baby was locked in a dungeon with nothing but a metronome and suicidal tendencies?" Probably not. But buckle up anyhow buttercup, because the Overseer of the Neo Cosmos is here to slap your ass.

This game is the embodiment of the phrase "easy to learn, hard to master." It's like being waterboarded by a rhythm game, but in a good way.

You press one button, and that's it. The controls are as simple and easy as a drunken one-night stand with your ex - minimal effort, maximum regret, and questionable satisfaction.

The visuals are as minimalist as a vegan's grocery list, but with a soundtrack that'll make vibe like a 17th-century bard on speed. Your ears will be the main stars here, so make sure to have those bad boys primed and ready for action.

As you progress, the game will start to treat you like a rhythmically challenged chimp as your fingers stumble through the minefield of beats, but when you nail it, you'll feel like you just got extra credit on the chromosome test.

Overall, A Dance of Fire and Ice is a gem. It'll remind you that life is an endless cycle of pain, joy, and funky beats. The game is a journey of musical masochism that's as enjoyable as it is brutal. You won't regret it.

10/10, would dance with fire and ice again.

Crosshair X is all about one thing: making you a sharpshooter.

No, not a real one.

To preface, I have completely played this game through and through on Switch.

Ladies and gentlemen, a game so mind-blowingly extraordinary that it makes me question my very existence. Disco Elysium is like getting a hand job from a Pulitzer Prize winner, the writing is just that good. I'm talking about prose so slick, it'll make you reconsider every word you've ever spoken.

This game's as complex as my tax returns. But fear not, my fellow degenerates, for it's also relatable as hell. You can get drunk and scream at inanimate objects, just like in real life! It's the perfect way to unwind after a long day of sniffing bath salts and wondering where it all went wrong.

The choices you make in Disco Elysium are so impactful, it's like choosing between wiping your ass with sandpaper or razor blades. Both options might leave you bleeding, but at least you'll have a story to tell at the next family gathering.

This game will make you question your existence more than the time I smoked peyote with a shaman in the Amazon jungle. Honestly, I still can't decide which experience was more enlightening, but at least I didn't have to wrestle a jaguar while playing Disco Elysium.

In conclusion, would I recommend Disco Elysium? Abso-f*cking-lutely. It's the perfect game for anyone who wants to get high, solve a murder, and question their existence all at once. So grab your bong, put on your detective hat, and get ready for one hell of a mindf*ck, my friends.