Recent reviews by Relic the Philosopher

TL;DR Read Bottom Conclusion ;)

The Elder Scrolls: Arena astonished gamers everywhere when it was released on the old DOS system quite a few years back. It is today, and likely will remain, the biggest game world ever concieved, and with an ever growing series it continues to get even bigger. And when TESII: Daggerfall hit stores, it introduced an entire new line of RPG, housing a rebalanced skill system, reputaion and faction systems, and much more. And not many could have predicted the arrival of TESIII: Morrowind, which brought a whole new batch of ideas into play. TESIV: Oblivion took off from Morrowind with a different setting and characters, more polished combat, and more immersion.

Then TESV: Skyrim was released, after many years of development. After that, the entire world of gaming changed. It employed all of the previous games' lore, gameplay, and systems, but then removed alot of the restrictions it contained. It took ideas from other landmarks in gaming history such as profitable dungeon delving, crafting, house owning and buisness running, marriage, adoption, assassination, the "no witnesses" idea, duel weild combat, and so much more. "Freedom" became a whole new word in gaming vocabulary.

Become a werewolf, slay dragons, assassinate polititians, murder housewives, rob robbers, slay giants, everything you could have asked for in a Dungeons and Dragons tabletop RPG, on screen with nothing but consequences to hold you back! Not a violent type? Become a travelling trader who consorts with bards and other caravans. A mage? Join the College of Winterhold and contact the Sigic Order. Ranger? (My personal favorite) Camp out in the forest and hunt animals and alchemy ingridients. Thief? Join the Thieves Guild for jobs. And so much more including Vampire Hunting, a part of the beastly Companions faction, be an Assassin, save the world from ex-extinct dragons, eat a full fledged meal, get the girl and be home in time for sweet rolls!

Listen to me ramble on, the best way to describe this game is to list every ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ thing this game has to offer and hope to not bore your reader. If you're still reading this, you've either already bought the game and are bored and so you look for good reveiws, you're an idiot who after reading many, many reveiws STILL hasnt found the incentive to buy this game, or you're a concerned parent who is looking for reasons to restrict their child from playing it.

And then there's mods. I myself thought that I would never mod this game. Boy was I wrong. I've never had this much fun playing Skyrim till I modded it, though my advise is to keep it lore-friendly ;)


I'm not much of the reveiwing type, but being a writer I figured I'd at least throw a good one out there to express my love for this game. The music, the immersion, the storyline, the freedom, it makes a game that no other could ever match. I played this for countless hours on the 360 console, and I'm glad I got it on PC too. MY ADVICE: DONT GET THIS DIRECTLY FROM STEAM. Buy a physical copy of The Elder Scrolls Anthology. It's the cheapest, plus you get all 5 games (save for Redguard and Battlespire), all DLC for all games, and five printed maps. Morrowind, Oblivion, and Skyrim can be redeemed on Steam with a packaged code. That's what I did, and I do not regret it.

Get the game, download Nexus Mod Manager to make modding easier, plus steam also has a workshop for it. Become anything, become all.

Fus Ro Dah, Dovahkiin.

http://youtu.be/rjTOF8IC528

The first time I played this game, I decided that leaning back in my chair was a good idea.
It wasnt a good idea.

Constipated? Have a seat on the toilet while playing this game and watch all of your problems "go right down the crapper".

10/10 would ♥♥♥♥ myself and fall backwards in my chair again.

UPDATE: I cried at the end.

So yeah it's pretty good actually. Also, I dont even own this DLC yet.

Here's the thing about Project Z,
The game is honest to God one of the best apocalyptic-storytelling games you can find, and let me explain why:

The apocalypse that is Project Z is, despite being overruled by the undead, a rather quiet apocalypse. More often than not, you will find yourself completely alone, perhaps more alone than you've truly been in the real world. Everything is trying to kill you, including ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ sheet-ropes, and no one is there to hold your hand, to hear you complain or cry or laugh. You are alone. The Last of Us places you into a world where the storytelling is reliant on the development between characters, Fallout NV places you in the shoes of an influential piece of a very diplomatic puzzle, and DayZ holds more danger in its players than its environment. But in Project Z, you are so totally, utterly, alone, unimportant, uninteresting, and entirely lacking in purpose. And so the story, short or long as it may be, follows you to your death, tracing your steps around starvation, depression, and loneliness. This story of being alone so perfectly fits into the quiet apocalypse, with few words, with no moral, and riddled with the ups and downs of struggling to survive. Everything you do is a part of the story and a part of your eventual downfall. To that effect, no other game matches this contemporary. Upon playing this game, your stories will each be unique and original and eventually forgotten, because the next survivor's story will always take the place of the last.

WHAT THE ♥♥♥♥???

Only If streched my mind just a bit, and I still don't quite understand what happened. And therefore, my short sentence to describe this game would be this small, yet never to be answered question. Now, in a longer description as to why I ask that question, I would say that Only If was confusing (in a good way), sorta challenging, very, very beautiful, along with a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ up story, but still made me ponder for a good long time about reality and nature. "You create your realities, the only true obstacle is yourself". I recommend you play this through at least once, and if you like it, you will likely play through it again this time making different choices, but then again 2 more times to figure out if you had fully understood everything that just happened. Then, several more times within your lifetime just 'cause it's awesome. Only If was like a movie to me at the same time a game, and one I want to watch over and over again.

You gain points from killing chickens.

OddWorld: Munch's Oddysee is an under appretiated masterpeice. With wonderfully designed characters, an awesome soundtrack, hillarious and strong story, strategy, action, and good old platforming, it is a game beyond compare. It also provides plenty of backstory, so you don't even have to had played the other games. And for only $5.00? Get out your moolah and buy this game now!

Abe is a hero among his people after destroying Rupture Farms and Soul Storm Brewery. He has saved a great many of his Mudoken freinds from being turned into lunch and tricked into slavery, but he always knew there were more of his brothers out there. Munch is a Gabbit who has lost his people. After the Glukons, those who were behind Rupture Farms and Soul Storm Brewery, used nets to capture all of the Gabbits from the ocean, Munch has been left alone without any hope of seeing another of his kind again. But together, with their psychic abilities, they will bring down the Glukons and Vyykers Labs once and for all, and get the last can of Gabbit Eggs to save Munch's race. But not without saving the Mudokens and the Fuzzles of course!

Some people critisize this game because of it being a port, but I think there is absolutely nothing wrong with any of the controls, graphics, or anything whatsoever. This game is a purchase you will not regret, and I also recommend the others in the series as well.

9/10

It's not terrible, it's not violent, it's not too complicated, it's simple, it's cheap. Great for kids. I even played it for a little bit, and as I said, it's not terrible, but it's not entertaining enough to keep playing after you lose your first life. I garentee, kids will love it, but don't let your girlfreind catch YOU playing it.

For kids: 8/10 Great fun for kids!
For older kids and adults: 6/10

10/10

Would vote "Big J" for mayor.

Even after Fallout 3, I still hungered for more, and considering that it was titled with a 3, I figured thre would be more of the series. I wen back even further in time to see Fallout, Fallout 2, and Fallout Tactics: BoS. And while I was immesnslly surprised at how old the series actually was, and how the gameplay was actually converted from a Top-down trunbased game (save for Fallout Tactic: BoS which was tactical combat) to a first-person open world. I looked to the original Fallout first, and was amazed at the detail that it had and how even with the way the game was in the different gameplay, I still felt like I was in the Fallout universe, and I think that Bethesda did an omaculant job at convering the game without changing the game's atmosphere and story world.