I own a rifle for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended.
Four Zomboids break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my Wooden Spear and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first zomboid head, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second zomboid, miss him entirely because my shooting skills aren't high enough and nails the neighbors window causing an alarm to go off.
I have to resort to the pipe bomb stash that i keep in the bedroom, "HEY OVER HERE" the pipe bomb shrapnel kills the other two instantly on spot, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms.
Spear charge the last zomboid. I break my spear trough his skull, since damage to the brain instantly kills them. Just as the founding fathers intended.

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

Haha, plumbus

B I T C H E S IN HENTAI BE LIKE: "WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT, ONII-CHAN?~"



YOUR HUGE F U C K I N G T I T S . HOW ARE YOU STILL WALKING? DOES YOUR ALSO ASTRONOMICALLY HUGE A S S COUNTERACT THE WEIGHT OF THOSE MONSTROUS MILK JUGS? YOU'RE A PROPORTIONAL ANOMALY AND I'M GENUINELY FASCINATED BY YOUR CONTINUED EXISTENCE.

𝙰𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚟𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚎:
𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚖𝚊𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚂𝙴𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙴𝙻𝚈 𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚌.
𝙳𝚘 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚞𝚍 𝚗𝚘𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚜 𝚗𝚎𝚊𝚛 𝚑𝚒𝚖.
𝙳𝚘 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝚋𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚗𝚎𝚊𝚛 𝚑𝚒𝚖.
𝙳𝚘 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚍𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚎𝚢𝚎.
𝙳𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚊𝚢 𝚜𝚎𝚝 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚘𝚏𝚏 𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚗 𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚌 𝚛𝚊𝚖𝚙𝚊𝚐𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚢.

I bet this dude eats soup with a whisk