Recent reviews by Houston

I have died more times on this game than every FPS combined


gg

-Hatfortress 2
-A community full of pubstompers and trolls
-Trading
+Fun Gameplay
-Gameplay Ruined by community

Unbalanced Flying ♥♥♥♥ Simulator 2015

Attacked a Warlord
Warlord shoots fiery arrows
Warlord's bodyguard has an irrational fear of fire
Bodyguard flees
I kill Warlord

10/10 bbq ign

This game is the best of the 3... Only buy the first to save money.

Wow.

Played for 3 minutes
Picked up flashlight
Opened Door
Walked a couple steps
Door Slammed behind me
Scared ♥♥♥♥-less
Ran around hallway
Hid in Locker for a minute.
Opened locker to try to grow a pair.
Demonic Alien jumpscare
Ctrl+Alt+Del
Shutdown
Unplug Computer
10/10 scarier than my gpa

-If you feel guilty about punching your friend in the crotch then buy this game as punishment.
-If you want to learn how to revive an unresponsive adult, let them play.
-The Atmosphere of this game is so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ good, NASA is currently considering using it to replace the Ozone layer.
-The soundtrack is scary like Monster Mash but not complete trash like meek mill.
-The jumpscares could strike terror in big russian man.
-This game delivers jump scares like No Man's Sky didn't deliver features
-This game was actually developed to find a cure for narcolepsy.
In conclusion:
eh it's okay