Recent reviews by lock in

Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2 – Chaotic Mini Review (Pizzle-Safe Edition)

KC:D2 is the most accurate medieval simulator ever created. You’re confused, everyone’s angry, and the world keeps yanking your pizzle at every opportunity.

Story & World

Henry returns—not older, definitely not wiser, but still with the energy of a man who accidentally aggro’d half the village.
Bohemia looks stunning. The kind of gorgeous that makes you stop to admire the scenery right before a guard fines you for existing.

Combat

Combat isn’t the soul of the game…
But it is the loud, aggressive neighbor kicking down your door yelling,
“DEFEND YOURSELF, YOU FOOL!”

No hand-holding.
No shiny weak spots.
No “press X to win.”

Just raw timing and enemies constantly trying to yank your pizzle the moment you get comfy.
Think you’re safe? Bandit.
Think you won? Second bandit.
Think you escaped? Another wave of angry bandits by the pond.

Gameplay

Everything else is chill.
You pick herbs, talk to villagers, explore forests like an unpaid intern in medieval National Geographic.
Take in the scenery.


Exploration

You take 10 steps into the woods:

Lost

Scared

Hearing noises

Unsure if it’s a bandit or a rabbit

Every tree looks the same.
Every road looks like a trap.
Every traveler looks like he’s about to rob you just for fun.

Bugs

The bugs range from “funny haha” to “the guard just ascended to the heavens and I guess that’s fine.”

Final Verdict

9.5/10
KC:D2 is immersive, brutal, hilarious, and constantly yanking your pizzle whenever you start feeling confident.
A perfect medieval mess in all the best ways.

- Hades is a near-perfect blend of fast-paced action, rich storytelling, and an addictive gameplay loop that makes it one of the most exquisite roguelikes ever created. Whether you're a fan of the genre or a newcomer, Hades offers an experience that’s both challenging and rewarding, keeping you hooked for hours on end.
- At its core, Hades is a roguelike dungeon crawler where you play as Zagreus, the rebellious son of Hades, attempting to escape the Underworld. What makes it so addicting is its tight combat system—every weapon feels unique, and each run is enhanced by randomized boons from Olympian gods, creating endless possibilities for different builds. The sheer variety ensures that no two runs feel the same, making every failure an exciting opportunity to try something new.
- Unlike many games in the genre, Hades excels in weaving a compelling narrative into its gameplay. Every death pushes the story forward, revealing more about Zagreus, his family, and the gods of Olympus. The voice acting is phenomenal, and the dialogue never feels repetitive, keeping players invested beyond just the combat.
- Visually, Hades is breathtaking. The hand-drawn character designs, fluid animations, and atmospheric environments bring Greek mythology to life in a way that's both stylish and immersive. The soundtrack, composed by Darren Korb, is equally stellar—combining haunting melodies with high-energy battle tracks that perfectly complement the action.


Conclusion
Hades is a game that sets the gold standard for roguelikes. It’s addicting, polished, and filled with depth in both mechanics and storytelling. Whether you're coming for the fast-paced action, the beautiful art, or the rich lore, Hades delivers on all fronts. A must-play for anyone looking for a game that keeps pulling you back in, run after run.

Spelunky 2 is an emotional rollercoaster. Coming from Spelunky HD, I thought I was prepared for anything this game could throw at me. I was wrong.

It’s definitely an upgrade in every way—more content, tighter mechanics, and a whole new level of chaos. The physics feel refined, the world is deeper and more interconnected, and the procedural generation is both brilliant and brutal. Spelunky 2 doesn’t just test your platforming skills; it tests your patience, resilience, and mental fortitude. It feels like Derek Yu took the philosophy of Spelunky HD and amplified everything, making victories even more rewarding and defeats even more crushing.

There are moments of sheer euphoria—discovering hidden routes, barely escaping an Olmec crush, or clutching a run with just one heart left. But then there are moments where you’ll want to throw your controller across the room as a mole ruins your flow, or an unexpected lava drop sends you back to the beginning. The game demands perfection, and sometimes, it feels outright unfair.

Yet, despite all the pain, I keep coming back. Why? Because Spelunky 2 has that magic—a blend of discovery, challenge, and sheer unpredictability that makes every run feel unique. No matter how many times it beats me down, I know that the next run might just be the one. And that’s what keeps me hooked.

Love it. Hate it. Can’t stop playing it.

After hundreds of hours, I still haven't finished the tutorial.
Great game 10/10

One of the few games me and my mates agree on shenanigans and havin fun, now its ruined by bots and cheaters.

#fixtf2

Pelts? Pelts....

PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLTTTTTTTTTTTTTSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Yes

I will leave the cat here, so that everybody who passes by can pet it and give it a thumbs up and awards.
　　　 　　／＞　　フ
　　　 　　| 　_　 _ l
　 　　 　／` ミ＿xノ
　　 　 /　　　 　 |
　　　 /　 ヽ　　 ﾉ
　 　 │　　|　|　|
　／￣|　　 |　|　|
　| (￣ヽ＿_ヽ_)__)
　＼二つ

Cancerous

edit: still cancerous but you apparently you get banned for no actual reason

10/10 will destroy your life

Teaches language better than your school. Idi nahui cyka blyat!