32
Products
reviewed
373
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Recent reviews by steppa pig

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Showing 11-20 of 32 entries
35 people found this review helpful
6 people found this review funny
17.8 hrs on record (13.0 hrs at review time)
What is Just Cause 3
It's an extremely fun open world action game with a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ of destruction and one badass grappling hook.

Why is this game so good?
One of the most endemic issues in the gaming industry is the sadness that overcomes a player when they whack their beautifully crafted car into an indestructable tree. In Just Cause 3, you can whack your car into a tree. Sure, it might not like it, but hey, it won't apply 11 trillion Gs of force onto your body because Avalanche have developed a ground-breaking mechanic for one of their biggest hits. DESTRUCTABLE TREES.

What kind of vehicles are there?
The usual civilian cars (although, there is a large variation in those), tanks, armoured fighting vehicles, more tanks, armoured personnel carriers, more tanks, helicopters, more tanks, attack helicopters, more tanks, civilian planes, civilian boats, military jets, military boats and a few more tanks.

How can I make the game more fun than it already is?
Mod. The. Grappling. Hook. If you grab one of those grappling hook mods that extends the range to 10km or so, you can go pretty much anywhere around the whole map in a matter of seconds. You might say, oh Deadly, that's just cheating. I say: Shut up and try it.

Can I play it offline?
You certainly can, although that will disable some of the interactive features such as peer comparisons.

Can I play it online?
Yes and here's the link. You need to download this from Steam but it's like 90mb to download so get over it.
Posted 30 December, 2017. Last edited 30 December, 2017.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
0.8 hrs on record (0.1 hrs at review time)
What is slavistan?
Basically, you attempt to do certain tasks as a gopnikwithin three slavic regions (Russia, the Balkans and Poland).

When you're in Russia, you have to break out those slavic dance moves to appease the crowd.
When you're in Poland, you have to keep your balance whilst downing extraordinarily high quantities of alcohol.
When you're in the Balkans, you have to beat up people and bears that are in a bar with you.

Does it get repetitive?
Yes.

Is it slavic enough?
Oy ♥♥♥♥♥. It is certainly true to the slavic ways.

Should you buy it?
Yes. For a whole 115 rubles, it is certainly worth it, comrades.
Posted 30 December, 2017. Last edited 30 December, 2017.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1.9 hrs on record (0.6 hrs at review time)
Reigns: Her Majesty is an extremely interesting and entertaining title by Nerial and Synaptic Insight Technology Systems and is published by the wonderful folks over at Devolver Digital.

Gameplay:
The game keeps you on your toes the entire time you're playing it. One wrong move and your reign could be over. It's extremely important to read each scenario carefully and weigh up your options as to avoid making a catastrophic decision that leads to the unhappiness of your people and the eventual death of yourself, sometimes, in an extremely gruesome and... interesting way. Remember, you can be brutally dismembered by making people too happy as well. Apparently, that's not allowed and you must be trampled on.

Should I buy it?
For the price, it's a no brainer. Picking up this game can lead to hours of fun and intrigue and can be a great way to relax after you've been blown up by your team mates in a doom & glood shooter.
Posted 29 December, 2017. Last edited 27 June, 2018.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
590.7 hrs on record (144.3 hrs at review time)
Summary:
Cities: Skylines is a stupidly addicting and astoundingly beautiful game made even better by mods and feature-packed dlc.

Gameplay:
Cities: Skylines is an extremely advanced city-building simulator which takes into account traffic flow, citizen happiness, Crime Levels, Fire Safety and much much more.

Building up your city takes time and effort. You have to constantly ensure all of your citizens are getting their required utilities (otherwise they'll leave) and that they're protected. On top of that, these entitled bastards expect you to spend more money that you don't have on luxury items such as SCHOOLS and PARKS.

DLC:
The core DLC in Cities: Skylines is fantastic and adds much wanted and requested features and options. I was blown away by the sheer amount of assets and changes made in the Green Cities DLC. I love Mass Transit, After Dark, Green Cities and Snowfall. Natural disasters are awesome to watch until you realise that tsunami killed every last whiny bastard in your town or that meteor wiped out your entire water grid.

The other DLC for the game (such as the minor content packs and smaller DLC items such as the Concerts pack) don't add enough to the game for it to constitute me buying them. Your mileage may differ here, though.

Mods:
I have 1170+ mods installed. 'nuff said.

In all seriousness, the mods make Cities: Skylines so much more alive and makes the game replayable countless times. Mods include but are not limited to: New assets, improved assets, improved and added mechanics, maps, completed cities, shaders and more.

Graphics:
The graphics in the base game are stunning (especially the sunrises and sunsets on the buildings and water) and you can modify these with shaders and other mods. There's also a photo mode, so you can remember the time before a magnitude 10 earthquake struck and destroyed your entire city that you worked on for so long.

Conclusion:
At the standard price of US$29.99, Cities: Skylines is a fantastic buy. At the (frequently) discounted price of US$7.49, it's a steal.
Posted 28 December, 2017. Last edited 30 December, 2017.
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1 person found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
79.7 hrs on record (36.5 hrs at review time)
Early Access Review
PUBG is a great game to either play competitively or to have fun with friends in. While there is the odd appearance of a cheater, you rarely see them (OC Server). This game is endless fun and is constantly updated by the folks over at PUBG Corp.
Posted 20 December, 2017.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1.0 hrs on record
What is High Hell?
High Hell is a fantastic Indie shoot-em-up title with cartoon style graphics developed by Terri Vellmann and Published by Devolver Digital.

Gameplay
The levels in High Hell are mindbogglingly fun, and mindless fun at that. The game isn't super hard so you can cruise through it without worrying too much.

The enemies are super accurate with their shooting and they do a significant amount of damage per hit. Take cover when you can.

Your health indicator is a battery metre. I approve.

The props scattered around each level can be shot out of place or manipulated a majority of the time, if you really wanted to cause more disorder.

The ragdoll mechanics allow you to send bodies flying into every crevasse of the map,

How badass is this game?
11/10 IGN. You can shatter a door into 7 trillion pieces and shoot drugged up ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ off a tall building. One of the ♥♥♥♥♥ you kill is a slav, too. 21/10.

Is there actual nudity?
You sick ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.

Is the sound track any good?
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ the end of mission screen sounds are sexual. The other sounds are super cool too. I just love the mission complete sounds more.

Is the loading screen 'quality content'?
It's one of those interactive loading screens where you can look around. In the words of my favourite Kazahkstanian man, "IS NICE". One of the loading screens allows you to graffiti a painting. Go wild.

Do you suck at the game?
I most certainly do. I cannot aim for ♥♥♥♥.

How many crimes are depicted in this game?
Deliberate damage to currency.[banknotes.rba.gov.au] That's about it. Oh, and murder, conspiracy to commit murder, drug laundering, possession of an illicit substance, assault and being red, among other things.

Who's the best character in the game?
Professor Meth. 110% best character ever.

Should I buy it?
Nothing is more satisfying than sending some high red ♥♥♥♥ flying off the side of a skyscraper. This game is absolutely worth buying.
Posted 23 November, 2017. Last edited 5 January, 2018.
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1 person found this review helpful
4 people found this review funny
0.0 hrs on record
Mmmmmm. Trams.
Posted 23 November, 2017.
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1 person found this review helpful
123.4 hrs on record (39.9 hrs at review time)
Another great PDX title. Great and many mechanics, amazing mods to expand the game to include present day content and much more. Only downside: UI elements might incorrectly render on smaller screens.
Posted 4 July, 2017. Last edited 4 July, 2017.
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1 person found this review helpful
410.7 hrs on record (18.2 hrs at review time)
Backtracks down runway, tries to take off, dodges cars and AFV's. Dies due to barrel. 11/10
Posted 23 June, 2017.
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2 people found this review helpful
553.5 hrs on record (7.3 hrs at review time)
GTA 5 is a spectacularily fun game to play that is constantly updated by Rockstar. If you're looking to play a fun and exciting game, either by yourself or with friends, this could be a great choice for you. If you enjoy having traffic cones places on your appendages and losing access to your office because some dropkick has modded the game, then this game, specifically online, is perfect for you.


Here's my previous take on the OpenIV situation, but that has been rectified now. I feel that what happened with this cannot go unspoken of or forgotten about. This awesome community made it possible for Take-Two to recognise their mistakes and retract their proceedings.

"I cannot think of any way a game as good as GTA 5 could be butchered so quickly by people sitting in an office trying to combat cheating but somehow you managed to do so. OpenIV allowed people to experience this game in ways never before thought and opened up a great and enjoyable community of modding. These mods brought the community closer together and made GTA 5 how it is viewed by many today. Until now, at least.
Rethink your decisions Take Two."
Posted 16 June, 2017. Last edited 22 November, 2017.
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Showing 11-20 of 32 entries