I hate being "self conscious", at one moment you feel a great burst of motivation to do something great, but in the end you'll just take a shower and go to bed again, forgetting the ambitious plan you thought and saying "it's gonna be a failure" or "it just won't work" because everybody forced into you the "hollowness" of being alone as nobody gives a f*ck about you and your accomplishments. After all that, you'll continue to strive the internet pointlessly, distracting yourself from the thoughts you're afraid of, from the action you should've taken and done despite being alone to yourself.
At some point you'll be tired, and sleep, you'll feel the anxiety, the urge, the motivation, the sudden realization of what you've been doing this entire time, and again, after all that, you fell into the dreamland.
In the morning, you just wish that you don't have to wake up from your dream, and continue living the perfect chaotic world where everybody loves you as you bend the rules of reality, and the fact that you don't feel any kind of negative emotion in that dream.
You'll continue living as an imaginary entity living in yourself endlessly, not caring about anything as nobody else cared about you, its just you, and happiness. And yet, you woke up from your early morning daydream, and continue your life, wishing that someday you'll be granted the ultimate prize as an email or a call of someone that'll change your life forever, giving you an opportunity of being noticed and rewarded for your hard work, but in the end this pain that eats you inside out won't go away, you'll still be a lazy, lonely, delusional, procrastinating individual.