Recent reviews by 󠁳⁧⁧valorawk tuah

big anime titty

{Appeal & Novelty}
Good puzzles (yeah duh) but the real appeal is the unique and tight movement system, allowing many cool speedrun techs so it's great for fans of puzzle games or speedrunning, or both!

{Good Replay Value}
Challenging for newcomers and plenty of levels to keep you content, including a plethora of approaches to the game's multitude of puzzles to keep new playthroughs fresh.

{Loads of Content}
The game still gets new levels after 8 years since its original launch! (for free btw)

{Conclusion}
Considering its cheap price tag (especially on sale), it's a very easy recommendation from me.

How many blunts can I smoke today?
Don't got time to count, I’m playing 2K
Shoot an n-word in the face with my Glock
If he doesn't sub to Ghetto Smosh

I'm a smoking machine, big-ass blunt in hand
Why’d you have to smash my bong? I'ma smoke your loud, man
I'm a real street thug, smoking bowls in one's and two's
Bong water like a river, need some gay-ass tissues
When I'm clubbing, I stay strapping, you could never kill me
I been ripping when I'm balling, hemp is all that I need
Watch me getting cross-faded, drinking Henny, getting sloshed
Strutting throught the streets watching ghetto-ass Smosh

How many blunts can I smoke today?
Don't got time to count, I’m playing 2K
Shoot an n-word in the face with my Glock
If he doesn’t sub to Ghetto Smosh

Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh

Don't know how I can walk when this weed is so good
Charlie smoked all the loud in the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hood
Selling loud on the streets, I get money and racks
’Cause you hitting me up for that chronic you lack
My tolerance is so high that they call me Chronic Man
Roll that paper, smoke that ganja every time that I can
Take a break from the smoking to go to KFC
What? A n-word got the munchies

How many blunts can I smoke today?
Don't got time to count, I'm playing 2K
Shoot an n-word in the face with my Glock
If he doesn't sub to Ghetto Smosh

Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh

Tobacco’s the worst, see, it's only blunts I chief
Cannabutter, smoke another, that ♥♥♥♥'s laced with kief
It's that ♥♥♥♥ I need, pass me more of that icky leaf
Smoke my weed grinded, don't mind it, I just love weed
Out here smoking with me, see if you can hang
Tried smoking hash, that ♥♥♥♥ ain't the same
Stealing all your weed, you messed with the wrong one
Roll a pack with my wrap before this snap's done

How many blunts can I smoke today?
Don't got time to count, I'm playing 2K
Shoot an n-word in the face with my Glock
If he doesn't sub to Ghetto Smosh

Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh
Ghetto Smosh, Ghetto Smosh

TL;DR An unmatched masterpiece with innovative and satisfying gameplay. Though, it's not for everyone and doesn't offer much replay value despite being so short

[Pros]
+) Visuals: Amazing art direction, cool character designs, good optimization, many awesome movie references to be found, stunning environment and level design. The game also never makes you feel like you're fighting the same people in a level, thanks to the enemy variety and their diverse designs
+) Music: Great
+) Story: Generic revenge plot with good messaging but no actual writing whatsoever so objectively, the story can't be bad (or good). Not a selling point since it's just there for those who want it. The game has 2 different endings, you can either kill or spare bosses so bonus points because the game doesn't force the "I don't kill" ending on you *cough cough tlou2*. The generic "revenge bad lol" lesson is actually conveyed in a good way here, not only were you and the main antagonist once like siblings, he even fights just like you and the design of the final level cleverly mirros the prologue. In fact, you go through the whole game beating up anyone who gets in your way just to reach your goal so you're really not that far off from being the bad guy. IDK how to word it but there's just something really beautiful about how far you've come, the irony and the feeling of deja vu. It's kinda similar to how you get your arm chopped off by Genichiro at the start of Sekiro but then bully both him and his weak ass Ojiisan at the exact same location by the end of the game, but I think this game does it better lol
+) Gameplay: Since story is out of the window, gameplay either makes or breaks the game and this game absolutely nails it. I don't want this review to be too long so I won't go into details but man, nothing is topping this game's combat in years to come. It has a posture and deflect mechanic like Sekiro but the similarities end there. Unlike Sekiro, this game is actually designed for crowd fighting since it's more of a beat em' up and allows for much more aggressive plays. The learning curve is steep but the game overall is very forgiving, there aren't healing items but the unique aging system allows you to resurrect right where you die, not to mention enemies don't regenerate health or posture. Not only do you get plenty of retries before getting pass age 70, you do more damage and have less health which encourages you to be more careful. The game punishes you if you just blindly jump into a fight with dozens of people, it encourages crowd control and rewards masterful play. And the difficulty options (excluding "Student") are great, "Disciple" is perfect for new players who want a challenge and "Master" somehow feels completely different while being mostly the same, that's what a hard difficulty should be instead of just making enemies damage sponges

[Cons]
- Audience: This game is not for everyone since the game is really bad at communicating with its players. Many mechanics are either not shown properly or straight up not shown at all, so I can't even recommend the game to people without telling them to first watch some playthroughs/guides. Kinda funny since this is a flaw that all FromSoft titles have as well so not that big of a deal
- Camera: The camera and hitboxes are actually great since they allow you to both tackle multiple enemies, and focus on just one. This is more of a pro than a con but dying to the camera janking over multiple enemies gangbanging you can be pretty upsetting
- Replay value: I never understood how people debated whether this game is a rougelike or not. There's just not much to do other than beating the same levels, it's not anywhere near being a roguelike since every playthrough is the same, there are no random unlocks or different routes or anything crazy like that. There are shortcuts but they're just for getting to bosses quicker rather being completely different paths. The core gameplay is just so enjoyable that it's worth revisiting, but that's about it. They've tried to address this issue by adding custom modifiers in an update, allowing players to tweak movesets, weapons, enemy behaviours, etc. so that does help make some playthroughs more refreshing but I don't think that does it for most people. There's also an Arenas mode that offers an abundance of content to compensate the game's short story and lack of replayability, but most of the fun is from the combat system so it can get repetitive

So yeah, I just wish the game introduced more roguelike elements because other than that, the game is a masterpiece. Should've been the 2022 indie GOTY but it got robbed by that stupid cat game. I just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ love this game, I can go on all day about its greatness and this dumb review just doesn't do it justice. For such a cheap price tag, it is very much worth supporting.

9.999/10 GOATED very very very beautiful game, literal masterpiece, very fun and relaxing gameplay, i play this game everyday to relieve stress, sadly i have 2 very minor complaints: the achievements are too easy and the game is too short, for your first playthrough it's a decent length (well it's your first playthrough) but there's just not much replay value unless you're a masochist like me and handicap yourself to make the game fun again, but considering the fact that every individual frame in this game is hand drawn, it's a given (and that alone is a reason in and of itself to support this game) wait but doesn't that mean the game still manages to offer a ton of content despite its lengthy development ok i change my mind 10/10 maybe idk still too short for me NEED MORE CUPHEAD

free to play for 3 days, even a loser like me can beat the campaign in 36 minutes (thanh hoa number!!!) and unlock 100% of the achievements in like 6 hours (square root of 36 omfg socks are blown)

very fun game to casually speedrun okok wish i get to play this one in vr one day (never)

better than odyssey

feels like a sr4 dlc (ironic since sr4 feels like a sr3 dlc) so not really worth the full price

+good open world
+gameplay is basically sr4 but better in every way and the flying mechanic is great, why don't more games have it?
+enjoyable activities and challenges

-bad story with cringe humor, didn't ruin the experience for me since skipping cutscenes exists
-too short and too little replay value for an open world sandbox game

overall not bad and really cheap on sale, perfect for speedruns too

somewhat fun when you first play it but after that it's just worthless stinky dog poo poo, literally no replay value whatsoever so maybe buy it on sale, play it once and forget about it idk it costs almost nothing but is somehow still a waste of money tbh

+giant dildo as a weapon haha now laugh (weapons like the shark shotgun are pretty cool tho, can't remember any other weapons)
+better than the reboot

-ok customization but a huge downgrade from the previous installment
-bad story with terrible writing, i guess it was hip for its time but now it's just outdated and cringeworthy
-your character (mc) feels likes a completely different person compared to the first 2 entries
-villains are laughably bad (borderlands 3 level bad, ok maybe except stag and the bald guy)
-bland open world with nothing to explore and boring npcs, such a deadass dead city
-bs difficulty like it's not even hard at all but for starters enemies are just bullet sponges and not fun to deal with, there's a tank enemy type with a flamethrower and if you get hit by the flame you get stunned and just die, hordes of enemies spawn out of thin air to block the driveway which means you can't even get to places and since they constantly shoot your vehicle during the process it would explode and you just die, there are missions where you don't even get to drive but instead your vehicle is controller by the game's horrible ai making your vehicle even more prone to explode which of course means you just die,... point is the game is terribly designed and whenever you die it's not even your fault and there's nothing you can do about it
-contrary to my previous point, once you max out all your upgrades the game becomes too easy like you can't even kill yourself whenever you want to
-boring activities, somewhat fun at first but they get old so quickly
-no replayable missions which the older games had, like seriously how can they make a worse game with better technology and a bigger budget?

goat