Recent reviews by Clippy Fishing

Arguing with Keanu Reeves is really fun.

There's a sidequest entirely based on a greentext.

I told my mom I was visiting some chooms the other day and she was really confused.

10/10

I've gotten more enjoyment out of this little game and its fantastic mods than I have from most AAA titles. It's a simple game with incredible depth, and consistently delivers satisfying victories and heart wrenching defeats after more than a decade.

FTL is usually on sale for like $3 and runs on anything, so you should buy it and regret nothing. Remember to upgrade your engines and good luck trying to unlock the crystal cruiser (you will need it)

After getting the game at launch, putting it down, and then replaying it now, I've come to the solid conclusion that Fallout 4 is a good game, even though it has some flaws.

These flaws have already been picked apart in more detail than I can give, but simply put they take the form of the dialogue, story, and quests. Still, if you look past these you find a game that is mechanically better than previous Fallout titles, whose perks and levelling are better thought out and balanced, and whose game world is lovingly put together and full of little details.

Now that the modding community has had plenty of time to do their magic over on the Nexus, Fallout 4 is certainly in a better state than it ever has been. Replaying it now I've had more fun than ever before, and It's really just a matter of enjoying the game for what it does right rather than focusing on what it does wrong.

Of course, this is made all the more easier by having a certain other game to compare it to.

Remember kids, you are always justified to spend your last bullet on the dead headcrab just to be sure.

10/10, would suffer headcrab-induced heart attack again.

This soundtrack is so good I decided not to pirate it

Simply put, this game is broken. There have been several occasions where the game updates, and then crashes on launch for no reason. I have been able to make the game somewhat playable by killing my graphics (the graphics quality at high settings isnt great anyway, and I have a good PC that should be able to run it fine) and doing several other voodoo repair methods. Even after that I get less that 30 frames per second and am still prone to crashes. This game is not optimised at all and probably takes human sacrifice to run properly.

In terms of the actual gameplay it's decent. Crafting works well and theres plenty of good survival gameplay. Fighting zombies is fun. I have yet to actually make it to day 7, which is supposedly when ♥♥♥♥ gets real and when hoardes of zombies attack you. This is mostly because any enjoyment I could have from this game is displaced by the lag, horrible graphics, and frequent crashes. I lack the willpower to survive 7 days of poor optimization.

If the game worked, I would recommend it, but it doesn't and that ruins it for me.

spicy

This game is pretty K, it has many goods, and some bads. The primo bad is as follows, the AI is dumber than a sack of fresh Idaho potatoes, and diplomacy is broke. I'll get into the good stuff, but I gotta rant a bit about this first. Every civ has an agenda, which is basically something he values, and will get mad about when other civs do said thing. The thing is in a game with multiple civs there is no physical way to avoid these agendas unless you sit in your capital and punch rocks all game, (but even that will make Rome mad because Rome doesn't like small civs). The end result is everyone hates each other and war happens every 12 seconds.

In civ 5 I had this problem, I accidentally became friends with everyone and had no justification to use my massive army I built up because I'm not a heartless bastard who attacks his allies. Oh boy how that's changed.

If you build a wonder, China hates you.

If you get a great person, Brazil hates you.

If you found a religion, Arabia will hate you.

If you don't like Sumeria's friends, Sumeria will hate you (but that one's OK because Gilgamesh is a ♥♥♥♥ and has no friends).

One time I actually managed to become friends with my boy Pericles, I intentionally didnt touch any city-states because it would make him mad. We were best buds, we traded gold and resources for years, had an alliance, it was great... PLOT TWIST, PERICLES HAS A HIDDEN AGENDA THAT SAYS HE HATES PEOPLE WITH UNHAPPY CITIZENS. MY CITIZENS ARE MISERABLE BECAUSE JAPAN JUST INVADED ME, PERICLES DENOUNCES, RELATIONS BREAK DOWN, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!!!

Yeah you can't have friends. Also people keep asking me for free resources even though they hate me and I hate them. Their battle game is weak AF, they just ditz around with donkey carts *cough* Gilgamesh *cough* until you kill them all, and if their units take even the slightest amount of damage they refuse to let it attack anything because it might die, and then it dies anyway because it's been ditzing around within range of my cannons this whole time.


K it's time for the good stuff, the stuff that makes this game worth the buy.

Graphics: Some people don't like the cartooney graphics, but I personally love them. Everything is animated and beautiful, theres a day-night cycle, you get to watch a time lapse of your wonder building when it finishes, its great.

Music: The music is awesome, the medieval themes are the best tho.

Espionage: Spies are more in depth, they target specific districts and can steal great works, steal money, steal techs, perform terrorism on innocent civilians, good stuff. Oh but the AI only ever uses spies to steal your money because they always in debt and are stupid.

Combat: The animations are way better, although I'm kinda annoyed they dropped unit sizes down to 4 dudes from Civ 5's 18 something.

Districts: Cities can now make specialized districts for stuff which is cool.

Gandhi: Our favorite warmongering pacifist makes a return, now almost as creepy at his Civ 3 form. And now his hidden agenda is always nuke happy, which is just great.

Quotes: They put freaking Monty Python and Garrison Keillor quotes in for when you research some of the techs, This alone makes it worth the buy.

Other stuff: I forgot the specifics but overall I've had a lot of fun with this game and do recommend it. Workshop coming soon too, can't wait to nuke Gilgamesh as Billy Mays and the OxiClean Civ.

I have somehow accumulated 832 hours of throwing chairs at nazis in singleplayer. Went on a multiplayer server once, little kids everywhere, was traumatized.

10/10 would RKO hitler again.

I've had a lot of fun with Rome 2, it has nice graphics, excellent unit and faction variety, good combat and good campaigns. Admittedly culture pack DLCs are terrible, and I had to pay extra just to play as greek states, but overall the game is worth the buy.