Recent reviews by Baja Blastius

Coming from a guy who benches 225, this game's pretty good.

This game probably makes up the bulk of my childhood gaming memories. Coming home from school on a Spring day just to immediately start up New Vegas. Or those long summer days in which I had nothing to do, so I spent them in the Mojave. I cannot recommend this game enough. Now, is New Vegas the best game ever? Not by a long mile. Is it the game with the best story? Also no, but it's definitely got a good, worthwhile one. Does it have the best gameplay, or graphics, or mechanics? Nope. But is it the game that'll catch your eye, and make you fall in love with it like an adulterous beauty you just can't stop coming back to? Absolutely. If you're only buying it now, what're you waiting for? Grab the DLC (they're worth it!), a few bug patches, and a Sunset Sarsaparilla, and go fight a war in the Mojave. And maybe, if you find the same love thousands have found before you, you'll come to learn the same thing those thousands before you all came to know. That war... War never changes.

Coming from a guy who benches 225, this game's pretty good.

Gives more testosterone than whatever Liver King is on.

"A man usually has one great love in his life. Sometimes there's a woman too."

Now I can bang my decrepit 78 year old brother daughter, my niece, after his death and start a civil war across the realm.

I impaled and boiled 67 people alive, had the nickname 'the merciless', and then got an in-game event about how my character thought about why some people are cruel.

FOR THE FAITH, FOR THE MIGHT OF OUR LO... Oh, wait, this game really does not have a great amount of religious activity in it. Woops. In fact, the game has multiple sex scenes, and premarital ones at that!

Other than that, it is really a lovely game. The combat starts out hard and unfair, but you do start as a peasant, don't expect to go around being a master and writing treatises. Or reading treatises for that matter, as you can't read either, you know, being a peasant and all. By the time you finish the game, combat is way easier, but that is not to say it is easy, unless you're on horse-back, never fight more than a single person! My only qualm with combat is that polearms barely have a spot in it, they don't even have their own skill! However, there is a mod that fixes that, but admittedly I have neither downloaded that mod nor actually used a polearm in my first playthrough. Sords 4 evah!1

The story is actually very good as well, although do be prepared to say, "That's it?" once it's over. Mind you, the story is not short at all, and for me it took me about 40 hours on my first playthrough, and I barely scratched the surface of the side-quests or DLC. The story doesn't quite have a full hero's journey, nor does it quite have a totally satisfying ending, and it doesn't quite have any massive battles, whereas at the very beginning you see a humongous army (and your computer ought to thank its lucky stars it's in a cutscene), for that you'd have a better experience going into Mordhau pubs. Despite all those things, and more, KC:D is really a must-have if you want a good RPG, a good sword-fighting game, a good medieval game (Metal Gear Rising proves the latter two do not necessarily co-exist), a good... Well, why don't we just leave it at a good game, because that is what it is. And a beautiful one at that.

"What makes me a good grenadier? If I were a bad grenadier, I wouldn't be here discussing it with you, now would I?"

"Not one of ya's gonna survive this!" *destroys whole unit of line infantry in 7 seconds*

"One short fuse, one wayward pinch of gunpowder, and kablooey!"

"They've got more ♥♥♥♥♥♥' frigates in the atlantic ocean than they've got the likes of me... So! T'arre you fine dandies so proud! So cocksure prancing aboot with your pouch full of musket-balls? Come and get me, I say! I'll be waitin' on ya with a whiff o' the ol' brimstone, I'm a British grenadier, with an unhappy bloody player!"

"Oh, they're going to have to glue you back together, in the CA office where they decide to try and pinch every penny out of their player-base while removing the features everybody actually cares about, while still managing to get us to buy their games."

briton :D