When 7-Up has got me down
When Hi-C gets me low
My Labatt's Blue ain't blue, it's brown
My Nestlé's Quik just makes me slow
When my sparkling cider's lost its shine
My can of Sharp's is dull
Hawaiian Punch has knocked me cold
A feeling hits my skull

And my mind just turns to Pepsi
And I couldn't tell you why
Smart drinks lead me to forget
And Coke won't get me high
When Constant Comment won't shut up
I'll sit right down and fill my cup
With Pepsi
Drink it up