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369 people found this review helpful
154 people found this review funny

Recommended

0.0 hrs last two weeks / 162.3 hrs on record (111.2 hrs at review time)

Posted: 19 Sep, 2021 @ 3:59am
Updated: 19 Sep, 2021 @ 4:02am

SPOILERS AHEAD I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING

1st Hour: Damn so I just have to click this giant cookie on the left of my screen and buy cursors and grandmas so I can passively make cookies? Well sure seems like a normal idle game to me.

2nd Hour: Ok so I understand a factory for making cookies but why can I buy a farm,mine,bank,temple and a freaking wizard tower that ,,Summons cookies with magic spells?"

3rd Hour: So apparently I found this feature named ,,Legacy" and it's some sort of reset for my game but I need to bake 1 trillion cookies? How am I supposed to do that? Maybe this alchemy lab or that portal that,, Opens a door to the Cookieverse" could help me.

5th Hour: My hand is getting numb from all this clickin-..wait..what's a sugar lump and why do I need to wait 24 hours for it to ripen?

8th Hour: These golden cookies that randomly pop on my screen are insane for making cookies. I can even combo them if I wait long enough so I can have 2 buffs at the same time and I am almost ready to do my first Legacy.

9th Hour: How did I play this game for 9 hours straight? When did the time fly like this? Why can't I stop? Am I gonna be stuck here forever?...
Oh well I just ,,ascended" and apparently there is a huge prestige points skill tree? Damn this game has so many surprises I wonder what I'll see next.

4th Day: I was finally able to fully train my cookie dragon so that I can have two auras at the same time for maximum golden cookie combo and passive cookie production and combined with the Grimoire from my wizard towers if I'm lucky I might even beat my record of 300 quindecillion cookies per second and If I wanna maximize my combos even more I should really start worshiping gods from the Pantheon and also start mutating more plants in my Garden with the help of this chart from the Cookie Clicker Wiki that specifies the optimal placement of plants for peak outcomes and I also should not forget that I have to pledge my loyalty every 30 minutes to the flesh eating grandmas or else they might send intergalactic creatures to munch on my big cookie and greatly reduce my cookie production but it's not that bad cause I finally got all the Santa Claus upgrades and now he is some kind of eldritch horror but at least he gives me 20% cookie production and in combination with my 400 idleverses,400 javascript consoles and 500 fractal engines I might be able to finally ascend again but not before I play a little at the stock market and pet my cookie dragon.

TL;DR: This game is a meth trip in the best kind of way do yourself a favour and play it.

[b]SPOILERS AHEAD I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING[/b]

[spoiler][b]1st Hour:[/b] Damn so I just have to click this giant cookie on the left of my screen and buy cursors and grandmas so I can passively make cookies? Well sure seems like a normal idle game to me.

[b]2nd Hour:[/b] Ok so I understand a factory for making cookies but why can I buy a farm,mine,bank,temple and a freaking wizard tower that ,,Summons cookies with magic spells?"

[b]3rd Hour:[/b] So apparently I found this feature named ,,Legacy" and it's some sort of reset for my game but I need to bake 1 trillion cookies? How am I supposed to do that? Maybe this alchemy lab or that portal that,, Opens a door to the Cookieverse" could help me.

[b]5th Hour:[/b] My hand is getting numb from all this clickin-..wait..what's a sugar lump and why do I need to wait 24 hours for it to ripen?

[b]8th Hour:[/b] These golden cookies that randomly pop on my screen are insane for making cookies. I can even combo them if I wait long enough so I can have 2 buffs at the same time and I am almost ready to do my first Legacy.

[b]9th Hour:[/b] How did I play this game for 9 hours straight? When did the time fly like this? Why can't I stop? Am I gonna be stuck here forever?...
Oh well I just ,,ascended" and apparently there is a huge prestige points skill tree? Damn this game has so many surprises I wonder what I'll see next.

[b]4th Day:[/b] I was finally able to fully train my cookie dragon so that I can have two auras at the same time for maximum golden cookie combo and passive cookie production and combined with the Grimoire from my wizard towers  if I'm lucky I might even beat my record of 300 quindecillion cookies per second and If I wanna maximize my combos even more I should really start worshiping gods from the Pantheon and also start mutating more plants in my Garden with the help of this chart from the Cookie Clicker Wiki that specifies the optimal placement of plants for peak outcomes and I also should not forget that I have to pledge my loyalty every 30 minutes to the flesh eating grandmas or else they might send intergalactic creatures to munch on my big cookie and greatly reduce my cookie production but it's not that bad cause I finally got all the Santa Claus upgrades and now he is some kind of eldritch horror but at least he gives me 20% cookie production and in combination with my 400 idleverses,400 javascript consoles and 500 fractal engines I might be able to finally ascend again but not before I play a little at the stock market and pet my cookie dragon.[/spoiler]

[b]TL;DR:[/b] This game is a meth trip in the best kind of way do yourself a favour and play it.

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