So my friend and I were debating on whether or not to buy this game. I mean, yeah it's only $8 but we were a little strapped at the time. It looked fun, though, which is why we were hesitant.
My friend decided to bite the bullet--he is the one with the better job, after all. I had to go handle my dog, so I was gone for the moment he downloaded it, but I saw the result. It was like nothing I'd ever seen before in my life.
He used to be a fairly heavyset guy with pimples all over his face and an awkward demeanor; not unlike myself, though more so I suppose. The man I walked into that day was different. I saw a 6'3'' bronzed warrior with perfect facial hair and a gleam in his eye that could make any lady drop at his feet. His phone immediately started going wild with notifications about the millions being depositied into his brand-new Cayman Island account. At that moment, I knew what I had to do.
I powered up my crappy laptop, barely even meeting the specs, and told Steam to install this game.
At once I could feel my crotch bulging as I grew three whole feet in as many seconds. The scruffy excuse I had for a beard was replaced with a layer of hair so glorious Zeus himself was jealous as I also grew six inches taller. I wasn't a large man before, but any semblance of being out of shape melted away from my frame like butter in an oven and my muscles gained glory I'd only dreamed of before. Even my dog, who'd only been a pug before, now stood proudly by my side as a German Shepard-Husky mix while a beautiful woman appeared in my arms, who is now my wife. Behind my friend, I saw the ghost of Genghis Khan nod in approval.
We played for a little afterward for giggles. That was fun too.