OH MY ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ GOD ITS OIL

HOLY ♥♥♥♥. OIL.

I WAS WALKING TO THE STORE. MINDING MY BUSINESS. THEN I SEE IT. A SHIMMERING PATCH ON THE PAVEMENT. I KNEEL DOWN. I TOUCH IT. IT’S OIL.

I LOST MY ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ MIND. I STARTED SCREAMING. “OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ♥♥♥♥ IT’S OIL!” PEOPLE TURNED AROUND. CARS STOPPED. SOME GUY RIPPED OFF HIS SHIRT AND STARTED CRYING INTO AN AMERICAN FLAG.

ONE MAN PULLED OUT A GUITAR AND STARTED PLAYING THE NATIONAL ANTHEM FROM PURE INSTINCT. ANOTHER GUY THREW A BURGER IN THE AIR AND IT JUST STAYED THERE.

I STARTED PUNCHING THE SIDEWALK OUT OF PATRIOTIC RAGE. MY EYES TURNED RED, WHITE, AND BLUE. I DON’T EVEN DRIVE BUT I BOUGHT A TRUCK INSTANTLY.

I ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ LOVE OIL. I WOULD DIE FOR OIL. I WOULD FIGHT IN THE TRENCHES FOR THAT SWEET, BLACK, FREEDOM-LOVING BASTARD JUICE.

AMERICA IS OIL. OIL IS GOD.

TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG SAHUR. ANOMALI MENGERIKAN YANG HANYA KELUAR PADA SAHUR. KONON KATANYA KALAU ADA ORANG YANG DIPANGGIL SAHUR TIGA KALI DAN TIDAK NYAUT MAKA MAKHLUK INI DATANG DI RUMAH KALIAN. HIII SEREMNYA. TUNG TUNG INI BIASANYA BERSUARA LAYAKNYA PUKULAN KENTUNGAN SEPERTI INI TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG. SHARE KE TEMAN KALIAN YANG SUSAH SAHUR.

how do i say throw that ass back in chinese

Holo is a hardcore weaboo, what can i do?
So it would be fine but, speaking in japanese quotes, doing anime gestures, ahegao faces, spekaing some random ♥♥♥♥ in japanese, quotes of vtubers and normally, i wouldn't care. But what the hell are you supposed to do when holo looks at you, makes an ahegao face and screams yabai. Oh and he ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ barks and say stuff like -he's a puppy "bark noises"- I swear, I'm getting insane. The worst part, he even does this when i speak with someone via phone etc.

I'm not a 7

found this on the front page of the Holo sub

Sometimes I fantasize about Holo coming home drunk and beating me until I feel numb. She kicks me in the ribs until I can hardly breathe. Then she starts to cry and apologizes, begging me to forgive her. She holds me all night as I gently cry into her sweater. Please help is there any hope for me?