FATHER, I CRAVE VIOLENCE
SKVETTIS   Sweden
 
 
So I (74M) was recently hit by a car (2014 Honda) and died. My wife (5F) organized me a funeral (cost $2747) without asking me (74M) at all. I (74M) was unable to make it because I (74M) was dead (17 days). At the funeral I heard my dad (15M) and other family members talking about how they wish I could be there and now I feel bad for not showing up. AITA?
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Cytkanuggetz
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Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Where'sWaldo? 3 May @ 4:28pm 
Fet balle 8/10
YOU’VE BEEN FREAKING HIT BY THE

|^^^^^^^^^^^^](ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧
| KAWAII TRUCK | ‘|”“”;.., ___.
|_…_…______===|= _|__|…, ] |
”(@ )’(@ )”“”“*|(@ )(@ )*****(@    ⊂(゚Д゚⊂⌒) NO KAWAII TRUCK NO!!!

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ONCE YOU'VE BEEN HIT, YOU HAVE TO HIT EIGHT ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ KAWAII ASS PEOPLE! IF YOU GET HIT AGAIN YOU’LL KNOW YOU'RE REALLY SO ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ KAWAII IT'S SO ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ SUGOI PEOPLE WILL PISS THEIR PANTS AND ♥♥♥♥ BRICKS AND YOU WILL BE THE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ LORD OF THE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ KAWAII! IF YOU BREAK THIS ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ CHAIN, YOU'LL BE CURSED WITH UNKAWAIINESS AND ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ FOR 9000 YEARS SO PASS IT; HIT WHO EVER YOU THINK IS KAWAII.
WiZz 3 Jan @ 4:51pm 
-rep retarded ♥♥♥♥♥♥, PLAY YOUR ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ROLE NEXT TIME YOU USELESS SWEDISH PIECE OF TRASH, I HOPE YOU ARE GONNA DIE WITH YOUR WHOLE RETARDED AND INCESTUOUS FAMILLY. I AM SICK AND TIRED OF RETARDED PEOPLE LIKE YOU PLAYING POS3 WITH POS1 BUILD, ♥♥♥♥ OFF AND DIE SICK OF CANCER YOU BRAINDEAD NUT SIZED BRAIN ♥♥♥♥. I HOPE YOUR FAMILLY WILL DIE SICK OF CANCER AND U HAVE TO SEE THEM ALL DYING THEN YOU DIE SICK OF CANCER ♥♥♥♥ HEAD. RETARDED PIECE OF TRASH! BRAINLESS ♥♥♥♥
Бездарь 16 Dec, 2023 @ 11:19am 
-rep hard lane retarded ♥♥♥♥
g-man 26 Oct, 2023 @ 7:23am 
-rep hard lane slark picker and feeder