Hey everyone, I am announcing that I am now taking applications for an E-Girl to play Counter-Strike 2 with. This is open to all, but there are a few requirements, listed here:

Obviously, you must be a girl, from birth and currently. I am not on some gay ♥♥♥♥.

You must be hot. This is not a subjective matter; I will need signatures from three ex-boyfriends and 3 male friends that you have not been in a romantic relationship with.

You must be supportive. You must ara ara after every “one tap” I make, and when I make a mistake, you must not “?” me.

You must be available when I want to play. I am usually on around 10PM-4AM Central Time; if I call, you must get on and play with me.

You must be between the ages of 18 and 24. I am not trying to babysit, nor am I trying to watch my gaming partner die before I do.

You must be “down to clown.” There will be times when I get horny and/or lonely; you must be there to snuggle with or nut in.

You must call me "Daddy." I will refer to you as "Kitten." You can choose to speak in a "Loli" voice, but that is not required (though it is extremely recommended, as it can skyrocket your chances of getting the spot).

If you meet all of these requirements, please send me a message with your IGN, Myspace profile, and AOL Instant Messenger Username. Get excited and get ready to play some CS!