Shawarmachine's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 20 Dec, 2021 @ 12:11pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2021 @ 6:43am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2021 @ 10:15am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 20 Dec, 2021 @ 12:11pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 26 Nov, 2021 @ 7:03am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2021 @ 6:07am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 4:09am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 11:18am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 22 Dec, 2021 @ 10:42am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 22 Dec, 2021 @ 12:14pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 30 Dec, 2021 @ 6:43am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 30 Dec, 2021 @ 12:12pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 4:36am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 23 Dec, 2021 @ 12:17pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 10:35am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 11:09am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 20 Dec, 2021 @ 12:11pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 11:31am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2021 @ 6:32am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 26 Nov, 2021 @ 11:12am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 9 Dec, 2021 @ 11:01am

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 11 Dec, 2021 @ 10:50am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 22 Dec, 2021 @ 11:22am

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Unlocked 23 Dec, 2024 @ 9:05am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 26 Nov, 2021 @ 11:14am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 21 Dec, 2024 @ 10:54pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 20 Dec, 2021 @ 12:21pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 26 Nov, 2021 @ 7:06am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 23 Dec, 2021 @ 11:52am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 26 Nov, 2021 @ 10:46am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 26 Nov, 2021 @ 6:38am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 11:03am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 26 Nov, 2021 @ 6:59am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2021 @ 10:04am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 10:53am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 22 Dec, 2024 @ 2:25am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2021 @ 6:42am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 22 Dec, 2024 @ 2:03am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 22 Dec, 2024 @ 2:10am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 30 Dec, 2021 @ 12:15pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 10:51am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 17 Apr, 2024 @ 12:49am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 12 Dec, 2021 @ 4:04am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 22 Dec, 2024 @ 3:21am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

8 / 30

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

12 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

12 / 30

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

29 / 30

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

1 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

1 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

5 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

1,300 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

20 / 30