A summary of what? What am I supposed to write? WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME NOW??? You want my personal details, huh? My life story? What?

It's a Secret, OK!? ...with a capital S! I choose to disclose information such as this only to the secret police, who are renowned for their ruthless secrecy and secret keeping skills.

If you wish to find out more about Dr_Snorkel, please send a package containing no less than 7 sachets of chocolate milk to: Mr Dr_Snorkel, c/o Secret Police, Secret House, Secretington, SE6 RE1. All packages are rigorously inspected for booby traps, in three separate stages before being openated. [sic].

#1. all packages are scrutinised under an Xray microscopic lens by a team of highly educated and pedantic lizard-people.

#2. provided the package reaches stage #2 unharmed, it is progressed immediately to stage #3.

#3. the package is opened.

If you're quite stupid and forget to send 7 sachets of chocolate milk and/or anything directly related to the consumption thereof, the lizard-people will bite and scratch the package to shreds. A hydraulic arm will sweep the tattered contents into a receptical of the lizards choosing and it shall be suitably disposed.