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Turned out the answer was to make sure Visual C++ 2017 redistributables were installed, force DirectX 11 instead of Vulkan, and use the latest release from GloriousEggroll.
I couldn't have done it without all your valuable insight. Thanks for being there for me when I needed you most.
++rep
+rep
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PEDO MACI GONDOLT EGYETT ,ÉS LEMATYIZTA A PROFILOD. Küld tovább ezt annak akit szeretnél ,h pedomaci szétmatyizzon!
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*(...'•'.. ) *˛╬╬╬╬╬˛°.|田田 |門|╬╬╬╬ .
¯˜"*°••°*"˜¯`´¯˜"*°••°*"˜¯` ´¯˜"*°´¯˜"*°••°*"˜¯`´¯˜"*° Merry Christmas!
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ℳerry ℭhristmas & ℋappy ℋolidays
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Ay, thou hast been caught gazing upon the cursed titties of promiscuity and whoremongering!
Woe unto the sinful man who sees these breasts, they shall wrought destruction and plague upon your blasphemous name.
I always knew that thou wast a bastard whoreson, prepare to be dispatched the coming morrow by firebrand; knave!
Anyone can be a friend of mine, as long as he is honest and credible, but we may be a little difficult to communicate... [language barrier] so I have to use Baidu translation.