According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow!
Let's shake it up a little.
Barry! Breakfast is ready!
Coming!
Hang on a second.
Hello?
Barry?
Adam?
Can you believe this is happening?
I can't.
I'll pick you up.
Looking sharp.
Use the stairs, Your father paid good money for those.
Sorry. I'm excited.
Here's the graduate.
We're very proud of you, son.
A perfect report card, all B's.
Very proud.
Ma! I got a thing going here.
You got lint on your fuzz.
Ow! That's me!
Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.
Bye!
Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!
Hey, Adam.
Hey, Barry.
Is that fuzz gel?
A little. Special day, graduation.
Never thought I'd make it.
Three days grade school, three days high school.
Those were awkward.
Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around The Hive.
You did come back different.
Hi, Barry. Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.
Hear about Frankie?
Yeah.
You going to the funeral?
No, I'm not going.
Everybody knows, sting someone, you die.
Don't waste it on a squirrel.
Such a hothead.
I guess he could have just gotten out of the way.
I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day.
That's why we don't need vacations.
Boy, quite a bit of pomp under the circumstances.
Well, Adam, today we are men.
We are!
Bee-men.
Amen!
Hallelujah!
Students, faculty, distinguished bees,
please welcome Dean Buzzwell.
Welcome, New Hive City graduating class of 9:15.
That concludes our ceremonies And begins your career at Honex Industries!
Will we pick our job today?
I heard it's just orientation.
Heads up! Here we go.
Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times.
Wonder what it'll be like?
A little scary.
Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group.
This is it!
Wow.
Wow.
We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life.
Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to The Hive.
Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey!
That girl was hot.
She's my cousin!
She is?
Yes, we're all cousins.
Right. You're right.
At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence.
These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology.
What do you think he makes?
Not enough.
Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman.
What does that do?
Catches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it.
Saves us millions.
Can anyone work on the Krelman?
Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones.
But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot.
But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life.
The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that.
What's the difference?
You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years.
So you'll just work us to death?
We'll sure try.
Wow! That blew my mind!
"What's the difference?"
How can you say that?
One job forever?
That's an insane choice to have to make.
I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life.
But, Adam, how could they never have told us that?
Why would you question anything? We're bees.
We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth.
You ever think maybe things work a little too well here?
Like what? Give me one example.
I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about.
Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach.
Wait a second. Check it out.
Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!
Wow.
I've never seen them this close.
They know what it's like outside The Hive.
Yeah, but some don't come back.
Hey, Jocks!
Hi, Jocks!
You guys did great!
You're monsters!
You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!
I wonder where they were.
I don't know.
Their day's not planned.
Outside The Hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what.
You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that.
Right.
Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime.
It's just a status symbol.
Bees make too much of it.
Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it.
Those ladies?
Aren't they our cousins too?
Distant. Distant.
Look at these two.
Couple of Hive Harrys.
Let's have fun with them.
It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock.
Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom!
He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me!
Oh, my!
I never thought I'd knock him out.
What were you doing during this?
Trying to alert the authorities.
I can autograph that.
A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades?
Yeah. Gusty.
We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow.
Six miles, huh?
Barry!
A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it.
Maybe I am.
You are not!
We're going 0900 at J-Gate.
What do you think, buzzy-boy?
Are you bee enough?
I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means.
Hey, Honex!
Dad, you surprised me.
You decide what you're interested in?
Well, there's a lot of choices.
But you only get one.
Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day?
Son, let me tell you about stirring.
You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around.
You get yourself into a rhythm.
It's a beautiful thing.
You know, Dad, the more I think about it,
maybe the honey field just isn't right for me.
You were thinking of what, making balloon animals?
That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger.
Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey!
Barry, you are so funny sometimes.
I'm not trying to be funny.
You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer!
You're gonna be a stirrer?
No one's listening to me!
Wait till you see the sticks I have.
I could say anything right now.
I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!
Let's open some honey and celebrate!
Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!
I'm so proud.
We're starting work today!
Today's the day.
Come on! All the good jobs will be gone.
Yeah, right.
Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal...
Is it still available?
Hang on. Two left!
One of them's yours! Congratulations!
Step to the side.
What'd you get?
Picking crud out. Stellar!
Wow!
Couple of newbies?
Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!
Make your choice.
You want to go first?
No, you go.
Oh, my. What's available?
Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think.
Any chance of getting the Krelman?
Sure, you're on.
I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.
Wax monkey's always open.
The Krelman opened up again.
What happened?
A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one.
Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.
Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life!
Oh, this is so hard!
Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler.
Barry, what do you think I should... Barry?
Barry!
All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine...
What happened to you?
Where are you?
I'm going out.
Out? Out where?
Out there.
Oh, no!
I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life.
You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?
Another call coming in.
If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today.
Hey, guys.
Look at that.
Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?
Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.
I

1.
INT. CASTLE INTERIOR1 1
There is a bed onstage behind a silky curtain, backlit.
PRINCE CHARMING (OS)
Once upon a time in a kingdom far,
far away, the king and queen were
blessed with a beautiful baby girl.
And throughout the land, everyone
was happy... until the sun went down
and they saw that their daughter was
cursed with a frightful enchantment
that took hold each and every night.
Desperate, they sought the help of a
fairy godmother who had them lock
the young princess away in a tower,
there to await the kiss... of the
handsome Prince Charming.
(enters gallantly onstage)
It was he who would chance the
perilous journey through blistering
cold and scorching desert traveling
for many days and nights, risking
life and limb to reach the Dragon's
keep. For he was the bravest, and
most handsome... in all the land.
(looks at the audience)
And it was destiny that his kiss
would break the dreaded curse. He
alone would climb to the highest
room of the tallest tower to enter
the princess's chambers, cross the
room to her sleeping silhouette,
pull back the gossamer curtains to
find her...
(pulls back the curtain to
reveal WOLF in the bed.
Gasps)
WOLF
What?
CHARMING
Princess... Fiona?
WOLF
No!
CHARMING
(relieved)
Thank heavens. Where is she?
2.
WOLF
She's on her honeymoon.
CHARMING
Honeymoon? With whom?
EXT. THE SWAMP2 2
SHREK
It's so good to be home! Just you
and me and...
DONKEY
(offstage)
One is the loneliest number that you
ever do...
(enters)
Two can be as bad as one...
SHREK
Donkey?
DONKEY
Shrek! Fiona! Aren't you two a sight
for sore eyes! Give us a hug, Shrek,
you old love machine. And look at
you, Mrs. Shrek. How 'bout a side of
sugar for the steed?
SHREK
Donkey, what are you doing here?
DONKEY
Taking care of your love nest for
you.
SHREK
Oh, you mean like... sorting the
mail and watering the plants?
DONKEY
Yeah, and feeding the fish!
SHREK
I don't have any fish.
DONKEY
You did.
(looks around for the
fish)
SHREK
3.
Look at the time. I guess you'd
better be going.
DONKEY
Don't you want to tell me about your
trip? Or how about a game of
Parcheesi?
FIONA
Actually, Donkey? Shouldn't you be
getting home to Dragon?
DONKEY
Oh, yeah, that. I don't know. She's
been all moody and stuff lately. I
thought I'd move in with you.
FIONA
You know we're always happy to see
you, Donkey.
SHREK
But Fiona and I are married now. We
need a little time, you know, to be
together. Just with each other.
Alone.
DONKEY
Say no more. You don't have to worry
about a thing. I will always be here
to make sure nobody bothers you.
SHREK
Donkey!
DONKEY
Yes, roomie?
SHREK
You're bothering me.
DONKEY
Oh, OK. All right, cool. I guess...
Me and Pinocchio was going to catch
a tournament, anyway, so...Maybe
I'll see y'all Sunday for a barbecue
or something.
SHREK
He'll be fine. Now, where were we?
(giggles)
Oh.I think I remember. Donkey!
DONKEY
4.
I know, I know! Alone! I'm going!
I'm going. What do you want me to
tell these other guys?
ROYAL MESSENGER enters to fanfare.
MESSENGER
(clears throat)
"Dearest Princess Fiona. You are
hereby summoned to the Kingdom of
Far, Far Away for a royal ball in
celebration of your marriage at
which time the King will bestow his
royal blessing... upon you and
your...uh... Prince Charming. Love,
the King and Queen of Far, Far Away.
aka Mom and Dad."
FIONA
Mom and Dad?
SHREK
Prince Charming?
DONKEY
Royal ball? Can I come?
SHREK
We're not going.
FIONA & DONKEY
What?
SHREK
I mean, don't you think they might
be a bit...shocked to see you like
this?
FIONA
Well, they might be a bit surprised.
But they're my parents, Shrek. They
love me. And don't worry. They'll
love you, too.
SHREK
Yeah, right. Somehow I don't think
I'll be welcome at the country club.
FIONA
Stop it. They're not like that.
SHREK
How do you explain Sergeant Pompous
and the Fancy Pants Club Band?
5.
FIONA
Oh, come on! You could at least give
them a chance.
SHREK
To do what? Sharpen their
pitchforks?
FIONA
No! They just want to give you their
blessing.
SHREK
Oh, great. Now I need their
blessing?
FIONA
If you want to be a part of this
family, yes!
SHREK
Who says I want to be part of this
family?
FIONA
You did! When you married me!
SHREK
Well, there's some fine print for
you!
FIONA
(exasperated sigh)
So that's it. You won't come?
SHREK
Trust me. It's a bad idea. We are
not going! And that's final!
ALL exit.
EXT. SHREK SWAMP3 3
SHREK, DONKEY and FIONA re-enter with GINGY and PINOCHIO.
SHREK is carrying luggage.
GINGY
(walking by and picking up
the ‘warning, Ogres sign’)
Don't worry! We'll take care of
everything.
6.
PINOCHIO
Hey, wait for me.
DONKEY
Hit it! Move 'em on! Head 'em up!
Head 'em up, move 'em on! Head 'em
up! Move ‘em on, Rawhide! Knock 'em
out! Pound 'em dead! Make 'em tea!
Buy 'em drinks! Meet their mamas!
Milk 'em hard! Rawhide! Yeehaw!
SHREK, FIONA and DONKEY pass back and forth on the stage
every time the E/E (Enter/exit symbol appears)
DONKEY
Are we there yet?
SHREK
No.
DONKEY
Are we there yet?
FIONA
Not yet.
DONKEY
OK, are we there yet?
SHREK
No.
DONKEY
Are we there yet?
FIONA
No!
DONKEY
Are we there yet?
SHREK
Yes.
DONKEY
Really?
SHREK
No!
DONKEY
Are we there yet?
SHREK & FIONA
7.
No!
DONKEY
Are we there yet?
SHREK
(mimics)
Are we there yet?
DONKEY
That's not funny. That's really
immature.
SHREK
That's not funny. That's really
immature.
DONKEY
This is why nobody likes ogres.
SHREK
This is why nobody likes ogres.
DONKEY
Your loss!
SHREK
Your loss!
DONKEY
I'm gonna just stop talking.
SHREK
Finally!
DONKEY
This is taking forever, Shrek.
There's no in-flight movie or
nothing!
SHREK
The Kingdom of Far, Far Away,
Donkey. That's where we're going.
Far, far --
(softly)
away!
DONKEY
All right, all right, I get it. I'm
just so darn bored.
SHREK
(groans)
Are we there yet?
8.
FIONA
(chuckles)
Yes!
DONKEY
Oh, finally!
ALL exit.
EXT. FAR FAR AWAY - CASTLE ENTRANCE4 4
MESSENGER
Announcing the long-awaited return
of the beautiful Princess Fiona and
her new husband.
SHREK and FIONA enter off-stage left.
KING and QUEEN enter off-stage right.
FIONA
Well, this is it.
KING
This is it.
MESSENGER
This is it.
(exits)
SHREK
(chuckles)
So...you still think this was a good
idea?
FIONA
Of course! Look. Mom and Dad look
happy to see us.
KING
Who on earth are they?
QUEEN
I think that's our little girl.
KING
That's not little! That's a really
big problem. Wasn't she supposed to
kiss Prince Charming and break the
spell?
QUEEN
9.
Well, he's no Prince Charming, but
they do look...
SHREK
Happy now? We came. We saw them. Now
let's go before they light the
torches.
FIONA
They're my parents.
SHREK
Hello? They locked you in a tower.
FIONA
That was for my own...
KING
Good! Here's our chance. Let's go
back inside and pretend we're not
home.
QUEEN
Harold, we have to be...
SHREK
Quick! While they're not looking we
can make a run for it.
FIONA
Shrek, stop it! Everything's gonna
be...
KING
A disaster! There is no way...
FIONA
You can do this.
Both parties begin moving toward eachother
SHREK
I really...
KING
Really...
QUEEN
don't...
SHREK
want...
FIONA
10.
to...
KING
be...
SHREK
Here!
FIONA
Mom... Dad...I'd like you to meet my
husband... Shrek.
SHREK
Well, um...It's easy to see where
Fiona gets her good looks from.
(chuckles nervously)
DONKEY ENTERS SHAKING OFF A GUARD5 5
DONKEY
(off-stage)
What do you mean, "not on the list"?
Don't tell me you don't know who I
am. (enters)
What's happening, everybody? Thanks
for waiting. I had the hardest time
getting into this place.
KING
No! No! Bad donkey! Bad! Go!
FIONA
No, Dad! It's all right. It's all
right. He's with us. He helped
rescue me from the dragon.
DONKEY
That's me: the noble steed.