We have checked our privilege and are quite satisfied with them.

Our secret agenda is to oppress minorities, stare down at the people below the glass ceiling, and uphold the eternal glory of the patriarchy worldwide.

We do this by hiding in dark basements and playing video games.

The group is open to anyone who feels they are sufficiently privileged. Examples include, but are NOT limited to: being white, male, heterosexual, or part of any signifcant major demographic.

You are, however, free to claim other, not listed privileges as you see fit, and they will qualify you for membership just as well, as long as they clearly oppress some minority or serve the patriarchy.