Moist

The first thing Moist did, he wrote Moistself
The second thing Moist did, he wrote the Moistlaws.
The third thing Moist did, he wrote the Moistworld.
The fourth thing Moist did, he wrote a Moistcave.
The fifth thing Moist did, he wrote a Moistgeode, an Moistegg of stone.

Everyone is Moist, but nobody is Moist.
Moist is everywhere, but he is nowhere.
Every Moist is even.


And in the twilight of the mouth of the Moistcave, the Moistgeode hatched and the Moisters were born.
The first Moister walked towards the light, and stood under open sky. He became too tall. He was the first Moist. He didn't find Moistlaws and he became enlightened.
The second Moister walked towards the darkness, and stood under a roof of stone. He achieved the correct height. He was the second Moist. He found the Moistlaws Moist had written, and he was endarkened.

But some of the living spirit of Moist was trapped in the broken stone Moistegg, and it became the third Moist, wandering the world unbidden and unwanted, without soul or purpose, learning or understanding. Fearful of light and darkness it shambles for ever in twilight, knowing nothing, learning nothing, creating nothing, being nothing.

-From "Moistbible (The Moists Moist wrote) translation - Moist.

The rest of Moistbible is too ancient and can not be translated even by Moist.