We're not here to service you...we're here to service the BuTtNeY

Steps to becoming a true BuTtNeY:

1: Add Buttney Groupie to end of name.

2: Praise any BuTtNey for their accomplishments (kills, bravery, nunchuk skills).

3: Give all BuTtNeY special favors at their command (as they are like rockstars). This includes orders to spray pictures of your Mom or Sister while in the shower. It also includes building a monument to BuTtNeY out of your own poo and then jumping in it covered in honey, proclaiming yourself as the sweetest ♥♥♥♥ alive (but I digress)...

4: Be a BuTtNeY Groupie for at least 3 months (time is estimated).

5: Know that papa T is the 1st BuTtNey Groupie, and will be judging you on your Buttneyness. If you do not exude Buttneyess at all times, you cannot be a true BuTtNeY.

6: Buy/Collect BuTtNeY trading cards and distribute as necessary. All proceeds go to starving victoria secret models who long to be with real men (aka BuTtNeY).

7: Begging to be true BuTtNeY will set you back all 3 weeks, and get you kicked from BuTtNeY Groupies.

8: Final BuTtNeY status approval will come from a real live BuTtNeY!