I am here to educate you about the single biggest threat to our planet. You see, there is something out there which threatens our very existence and may be the end to the human race as we know it... I'm talking, of course, about ManBearPig. It is a creature which roams the earth alone. It is half man, half bear, and half pig. Some people say that ManBearPig isn't real. Well I'm here to tell you now, ManBearPig is very real, and he most certainly exists. I'm cereal. ManBearPig doesn't care who you are or what you've done. ManBearPig simply wants to get you. I'm super cereal. But have no fear, because I am here to save you. And someday, when the world is rid of ManBearPig, everyone will say, "Thank you Al Gore, you're super awesome!"
The end.

Thank you, class.

Excelsior!