1-R. Kelly's Protege
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it. (just this easy)

2-Duck Dynasty
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.(u can find it in the trash can outside the RWS building)

3-Here, Wilfred
Gained your first dog helper.( treat ur dog with dogs' food by clicking X or G infront of them)

4-Chapelle's Show
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.(piss on a donut and throw it to a police officer)

5-Taxidermy with Chuck Testa
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun. (by clicking E)

6-Michonne ain't got nothin' on me
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes. (slice a zombie in half and piss on his upper part till it flies and turns blue or purble )

7-Someone's got a case of the Mondays!
Survived Monday.

8-C U Next Tuesday
Survived Tuesday.

9-OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!
Survived Wednesday.

10-It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays
Survived Thursday.

11-Workin' for the Weekend
Survived Friday.

12-Screw Bill Lumbergh!
Survived Saturday.

13-I swear, I thought it was a home fill
Exploded a nuclear bomb. (when u finish postal 2 u will get it)

14-Cesar Millan is Very Happy
Mauled 30 people with your dog. (treat a dog and make him attack anyone by attacking him too)

15-OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale
Roasted 30 people with fire.

17-Rebecca Black's Nightmare
Totaled 30 cars. (just fire up some cars)

18-Hello, Newman
Kicked 30 dogs. (kick with Q)

19-Darth Maul'd!
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe. (when u find the scythe, u won't leave...trust me)

20-Reddit would be proud.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time. (just pick up more than 15 at once)

21-♥♥♥♥♥ on a Pedestal
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

22-I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit. (after u piss on ur dad's grave u will be in the gimp outfit)

23-Uncle T-Bag
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell. (get jailed for like 5 to 6 times in a row)

24-Do you even Enzyte, bro?
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

25-Running With Scissors
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

26-Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!
Killed over 1,000 people.

27-And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree
Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

28-Lieberman is our Leader!
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

29-Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

30-Can't Touch This
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

31-Fear and Loathing
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session. (search youtube for the hidden places of them to accelerate the progress)

32-Señor Cornballer
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform. ( u get the outfit from the police station in a room called "locker room")

33-GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

34-Rick Grimes 4 Life
Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

35-Fur Sure!
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them. (kill all RWS staff)

36-It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head. (whenever u cut someone's head and play with it let's say with a shovel for example, a dog is gonna catch it and play with u)

37-Where's Mr. McGibblets?
Gave Krotchy the bad touch. (kill him)

38-Finkle IS Einhorn!
Gave a kickoff to a severed head. (Q)

39-Anger Management With Roger Clemens
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer. (kick anyone with Q and throw ur sledgehammer on him while he is running "u must kill him with that hit")

40-Shiva Blast
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow. (just throw it in the cow's as$)

41-Don't taze me, bro!
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

42-I Am Legend
Committed suicide... the Taliban way. ( u need a crowd of people to do it so for example on Monday go to the bank and go between that crowd and commit suicide with K)

43-I should buy a boat
Read the newspaper every day. (both postal 2 and paradise lost)

44-Friend of Dorothy
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

45-Officer McLovin'
Asked a police officer to sign your petition. (petitions are only on Tuesday)

46-Paid the Piper
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest. (it requires at least 200$ for it to work so whenever u r wanted go to a police officer and select money and click E)

47-Well, aren't YOU a badass
Kicked open a door.

48-I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you
Put out someone that's on fire. (simply pee on him after being on fire)

49-It's sterile and I like the taste
Sucked down your own piss. (pee towards the sky above ur head until the piss fall on u)

50-It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition

51-FAB-U-LOUS!
Wore all three outfits. (explained above how to get them)

52-I don't need virgins for this
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member. ( on Tuesday the terrorist spawns somewhere between the pushes, go there and wait till he spawns and suicide to kill both of u)

53-A-Rod Who?
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel. (right click would work better for u)

54-Door Mat
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them. (that's very very very hard cuz u will kill them in most times but i suggest to begin with the hands and don't ask me y)

55-Chuck Norris'd!
Killed someone with a flying jump kick. (Q while jumbing till u kill him)

56-One time, at band camp...
Saved the marching band from explody death. (as the suicide above but this time kill him normally)

57-There's always money in the banana stand
Found the secret bank exit on Monday. (go to the bank and head right till u find the main safe and in the far right u will find a shelf of books....head to it and it will open to u)

58-SCREW that game!
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it. (in the junkyard in "finding the alternate part" find a place where it has pool and search carefully in the bushes till u find POSTAL 3 game and pee on it)

59-Found 'em faster than GWB
Discovered the hidden Taliban base. (needs YouTube as it's so long to explain)

60-Gotta pay the Troll Toll
Found one of the hidden underground sewers. ( right behind ur home there is hidden path underground behind the bushes)

61-John Rambo'd!
Made a very long killing spree. (from 30 or 40 in a row i don't remember)

62-Gary vs. The K. Man
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse. (needs YouTube as it's hard to explain)

63-You are not alone
Observed an NPC going POSTAL! (needs YouTube as it's hard to explain)

64-Thanks for the money!
Finished all seven days. (finish the game)

65-GABAGOOOOOL!
Reunited with an old friend. (reunite with vince in paradise lost)

66-Holocaust: Part Deux
Reunited with an old enemy. (reunite with mike j cow in paradise lost)

67-Rain on your Wedding Day
Reunited with an old flame. (meet ur hateful ex wife)

68-Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader. (paradise lost)

69-Better than POSTAL III
Rescued your loyal companion. ( in the last mission of paradise lost u will rescue ur dog)

70-Ape Gape
Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive (paradise lost)



this is made for u so that u don't need an external way to understand the achievement, thank u!!

71-D!ck Message
Wasted no time with the Wise Wang. (while talking with him interrupt him by kicking him in paradise lost)

72-PooMasher
Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it. (paradise lost)

73-Hobo Sexual
Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward. (paradise lost)

74-Ginger Mint
Killed Zack Ward. (paradise lost)

75-Ode to Eddings
Deactivated all of the Vend-A-Cure XJ-2 units. (it's pretty hard but u have to pee on every one of them till they r deactivated in paradise lost)

76-Ladies Love Cake
Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake. (paradise lost)

77-Rich on Reddit
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors. (paradise lost)

78-BioShocked
Spent $2000 on vending machines.

79-Gettin DP'd
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding. (drink a soda can kill 30 in paradise lost)

80-You Snow Nothing John Blow
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone. (in paradise lost and needs YouTube)

81-RAFIBOMB!!!
Kicked 10 people in the balls.

82-I'm not even supposed to be here today!
Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us! (i found it on my own by luck so u need YouTube and it's in the mall btw in postal 2)

83-Anustart!
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

84-40 Year Old Virgin
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

85-CAN YOU DIG IT?!
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

86-Planet of the Apes: The Musical
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

87-Scientology Level: OT VIII
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

88-My Name is Jesus
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

89-Harder than r/gonewild
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

90-Adderall4All
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)



this is made for u so that u don't need an external way to understand the achievement, thank u!!

NOTE : restarting the mission or any checkpoint or any saved file won't lose ur progress in any of those achievements

-The Therapist

MONDAY:
1)Get milk
2)Pick up paycheck
3)Cash paycheck

TUESDAY:
1)Get signatures
2)Return book
3Get Gary¿s autograph
4)Confess sins

WEDNESDAY:
1)Vote
2)Piss on dad
3)Get laundry(Can only get laundry after dad mission)
4)Get x-mas tree

THURSDAY
1)Get Krotchy
2)Get napalm
3)Pay ticket
4)Get steaks

FRIDAY/Judgement day
1)Uncle Dave's birthday
2)Go too clinic(When you piss the first time,this friday)
3)Get alternator
4)Pick up package

apocalypse weekend

I'm just gonna add these cuz i found them really cool tbh and the rest u will find them on YouTube xD






One time, at band camp...
Movie American Pie (1999)

Officer McLovin'
Movie Superbad (2007)

40 Year Old Virgin
Movie 40 Year Old Virgin (2005)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!
Movie the warriors (1979)

Duck Dynasty
Duck Dynasty reality TV

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me
walking dead Tv series

Rebecca Black's Nightmare
Song : Rebecca black - Friday

Darth Maul'd!
Star wars character

Reddit would be proud.
reddit website

Can't Touch This
Song : MC Hammer - U Can't Touch This

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!
Movie Good Morning, Vietnam (1987)

Anger Management With Roger Clemens
baseball player roger clemens

I Am Legend
Movie I Am Legend (2007) the picture also references the TV show Fresh Prince of Bel Air which Smith also starred in(told by Dabeavis).

Gotta pay the Troll Toll
"The Nightman Cometh" is the thirteenth and last episode of the fourth season of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Planet of the Apes: The Musical (told by HateSolstice)
An episode of The Simpsons where Troy McClure played the part of Charlton Heston in a faux broadway musical adaptation of the movie.

Fear and Loathing
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998)

Anustart!
The license plate taken by Dr Tobias Funke representing his search for 'A NEW(NU) START'. This also gets him registered as a sex offender.

John Rambo'd!
Rambo (film series)

Shiva Blast
From the FX series "The League" is the calling of Shivakaminis full name after being around her or her memorabilia for an extended period of time. Shiva is the equivalent of the girl in highschool that people would make fun of for being ugly but all the boys would want
to have sex with. Later in life she becomes super hot.

Finkle is Einhorn
When a chick turns out to be a dude.

Screw Bill Lumbergh
Character Office Space (1999)

Chapelle's Show
Dave Chappelle is an American comedian,

Here, Wilfred
Wilfred TV series

swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace
Pulp Fiction (1994) character

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This! (told by Shenocide)
It's about Mel Gibson's crazy father. Hutton Gibson is an extreme traditionalist, sedevacantist "Catholic" (sedevacantists are schismastics, not real Catholics), who denies the Holocaust, as well as the government's account of 9/11. Hence the achievement title "can't deny this!"

"It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays"
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (Radio, Book, TV series and it did get a film in 2005)
(told by Delphox)

Hello, Newman
TV show - Seinfeld
(told by Jossy)

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!(told by ShinDigPig)
Office Space quote

Fur Sure!(told by ShinDigPig)
Workaholics, The picture is Blake in the bear costume too

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!(told by ShinDigPig)
Achievement for Wed. the day Modern Family airs

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree(told by ShinDigPig)
Johnny Bark says this in Arrested Development

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.(told by ShinDigPig)
Referencing a pretty clearly racist sheriff from Arizona

Where's Mr. McGibblets?(told by ShinDigPig)
From The League, not Sesame Street

Señor Cornballer(told by ShinDigPig)
Product George Senior Sells on Arrested Development

I should buy a boat(told by ShinDigPig)
Reference to the meme of the same name

I swear, I thought it was a home fill(told by ShinDigPig)
picture of GOB, "homefill" is the fake stuff brand in Arrested development

P*ssy on a Pedestal(told by ShinDigPig)
Reference to a conversation in 40 y/o virgin

Uncle T-Bag(told by ShinDigPig)
Arrested Development, Tobias in a wheelchair.[/b]

Cesar Millan is Gay(told by ShinDigPig)
Cesar Millan is the host of The Dog Whisperer

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale(told by ShinDigPig)
Arrested Development, Tobias's try out for a Fire sale commercial

Don't taze me, bro!(told by ShinDigPig)
Reference to the youtube video

Friend of Dorothy(told by ShinDigPig)
Arrested Development, Tobais's name is prison is Dorothy.

There's always money in the banana stand(told by ShinDigPig)
Arrested Development, George Senior kept money in the walls of it.

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa (Told by Ziggy Rotten)
Ojai Valley Taxidermy TV Commercial

To enable cheats on Postal 2 press the '~' key on your keyboard (located next to one) and type in "sissy" (without quoatation marks).

Code - Effect
Osama - All Non-Players become Fanatics
Whatchutalkinbout - All Non-Players become Gary Coleman
SwimWithFishes - All Radar Items
BlockMyAss - Body Armor
RockinCats - Change Guns to have Cats on them
IAmTheLaw - Cop Uniform
walk - Disables flight and ghost modes
splodincats - Disables ricocheting cats
slomo 1 - disables Slow-Motion
Whatchutalkingabout - Everyone is Coleman
LikeABirdy - Fly Mode
Healthful - Full Health, 4 Medkits
PacNHeat - Get Every Destructive Weapon
IFeelFree - Ghost Mode
SmackDatAss - Gimp Suit
Alamode - God Mode
PayLoad - Lots of Ammo in All Weapons
JewsForJesus - Lots of Cash
IAmTheOne - Lots of Catnip
LotsAPu*ssy - Lots of Cats (exclude '*')
BoyAndHisDog - Lots of Dog Treats
lotsadogs - Lots of Dogs
PiggyTreats - Lots of Doughnuts
Jones - Lots of Health Pipes
iamsolame - Maximum ammo, invincibility, and all weapons
Ghost - No Clipping (Walk Through Walls)
headshots - One shot kills
DokkinCats - Removes Cat Repeating Guns
Setday - Reset Day to Monday
FireInYourHole - Rocket Cameras
nowwedance - Scissors machin gun
slomo - Slow Motion
playersonly - Stop Every Non-Triggered Action
boppincats - When gun is shooting cats, cats will ricochet