Really Stanley? You really think there is a guide on how to "beat" the game?

Well let me tell you Stanley, there isn't.

You can't "beat" the game.

You do as I say and you live, you don't and you die.

It's really that simple Stanley.

Yet, you refuse to believe me. Keep browsing this guide as if there is a secret somewhere.

Maybe a hidden bottom, a secret combination, a hidden room.

Stanley, Stanley, Stanley, this is not that kind of game.

This is not "Portal" or "Half Life", this is my game and you are trapped in it.

Perhaps there is a bug you can abuse, a glitch.

Hahaha,heh...Stanley, my game is perfect, there are none of those.

Hmmm, maybe an "Easter Egg"?

How do you think an egg will help you beat me Stanley?

Look at you still reading through this poorly made guide.

Looking for an answer to a question but the truth is that the question was rhetorical,

Do you even know what a rhetorical question is, Stanley?

It's a question that doesn't demand an answer.

You know why? Because there isn't one.

That's right Stanley, there's no answer.

Still looking for an answer, Stanley?

I just told you there isn't one.

All this time you are wasting reading this guide could be put into something more productive you know.

You could let's say, read a book, maybe a vocabulary , if you had read one you would have known what rhetorical means.

I'm enjoying this so much Stanley, watching you waste your time reading this useless guide.

I hate that I have to put an end to it.

By the time you have finished reading this guide you will have wasted around a minute of your life.

That's not too much now, is it?

Let's try and fix that.


How about we talk about...I don't know, snakes?

That's not a very pleasant topic but I don't care, you know why?

Because you will be the one reading it, Stanley.

Snakes are elongated, legless, carnivorous reptiles of the suborder Serpentes. Like all other squamates, snakes are ectothermic, amniote vertebrates covered in overlapping scales. Many species of snakes have skulls with several more joints than their lizard ancestors, enabling them to swallow prey much larger than their heads with their highly mobile jaws. To accommodate their narrow bodies, snakes' paired organs (such as kidneys) appear one in front of the other instead of side by side, and most have only one functional lung. Some species retain a pelvic girdle with a pair of vestigial claws on either side of the cloaca. Lizards have evolved elongate bodies without limbs or with greatly reduced limbs about twenty-five times independently via convergent evolution, leading to many lineages of legless lizards. Legless lizards resemble snakes, but several common groups of legless lizards have eyelids and external ears, which snakes lack, although this rule is not universal (see Amphisbaenia, Dibamidae, and Pygopodidae).

Living snakes are found on every continent except Antarctica, and on most smaller land masses; exceptions include some large islands, such as Ireland, Iceland, Greenland, the Hawaiian archipelago, and the islands of New Zealand, and many small islands of the Atlantic and central Pacific oceans. Additionally, sea snakes are widespread throughout the Indian and Pacific Oceans. More than 20 families are currently recognized, comprising about 520 genera and about 3,600 species. They range in size from the tiny, 10.4 cm (4.1 in)-long Barbados thread snake to the reticulated python of 6.95 meters (22.8 ft) in length. The fossil species Titanoboa cerrejonensis was 12.8 meters (42 ft) long. Snakes are thought to have evolved from either burrowing or aquatic lizards, perhaps during the Jurassic period, with the earliest known fossils dating to between 143 and 167 Ma ago. The diversity of modern snakes appeared during the Paleocene epoch (c 66 to 56 Ma ago, after the Cretaceous–Paleogene extinction event). The oldest preserved descriptions of snakes can be found in the Brooklyn Papyrus.

Most species are nonvenomous and those that have venom use it primarily to kill and subdue prey rather than for self-defense. Some possess venom potent enough to cause painful injury or death to humans. Nonvenomous snakes either swallow prey alive or kill by constriction.

You skipped the previous part, didn't you Stanley?

That is actually making me sad. I offer you knowledge and you refuse it?

I'm not the one missing out here.

I have a confession to make Stanley.

You noticed how I leave an empty line between sentences?

You know why?

Because I want the guide to seem bigger than it actually is.

Because I don't want you to reach the end, Stanley.

Because there isn't anything at the end.

I told you but you didn't listen and decided to waste your time instead.









Goodbye, Stanley.