"#171 +(983)- [X][+Vile] (smcn): just because you dress like them doesnt mean you are

[!smcn] m/sg Vile would you like to touch my breasts

[!smcn] oops
#751 +(1056)- [X][reidman   ) why is there an ad for Windows Media Player on the Apple Quicktime site??

[|Dan|     ) god only knows why

[|Dan|     ) and he's laughing
#1413 +(443)- [X]<TheVirus> i hate when im takin a whizz, and then im almost done, then i get those damned piss shakes. and my piss goes all over the damn place, then my cat comes in and licks it up. good cat =D
#2133 +(427)- [X]<Kashan> I think we should circumsize horses so they look prettier in the porn videos
#2802 +(241)- [X]<[_pitch_]> florida is shaped like a big droopy ♥♥♥♥ for a reason...
#3523 +(345)- [X]<JFalcon> sex is too much work... and the customers always complain.
#3970 +(61)- [X]<Hostile> Would you eat mung if it tasted like chicken?

<Hostile> Would you eat chicken if it tasted like mung.

<Scofco> ...

<Scofco> what's mung?

<Hostile> It's the stuff inside of a pregnant chick i think.

<Scofco> there's lots of stuff inside pregnant chicks

<Hostile> Yeah, that's mung.
#5074 +(111)- [X]<`rip> ryano is a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

<clay> yes

<clay> a social ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

<clay> much like the social smoker

<clay> he puffs for his homies

<`rip> puffs on his homies
#7010 +(54)- [X]<`Kd> theres another good spelling leason
#8023 +(2)- [X]<kt> i need a job, badly.

<kt> maybe i should hang out with some black people

<kt> i mean go to the unemployment office.
#10785 +(522)- [X]<rogers> hahah

<guyen> roger: i love you man

<guyen> and by "love" i mean that special "stab you in the face and ♥♥♥♥ down your throat" love

<rogers> i love you too man
#13444 +(750)- [X]<@Shadowbuilder> haha have you ever seen that commercial

<@Shadowbuilder> theres kid talking on a chat room

<@NwG|Canucks> no explain

<@Shadowbuilder> hes cybering with some girl, and he says "moan, moan for me as load as possible"

<@Shadowbuilder> then you hear thing sound come from the corner of his house, soudns like moaning

<@Shadowbuilder> and the kid says "mom?????"

<@NwG|Canucks> lol
#16766 +(207)- [X]<Grim13> Mariah Carey's cleavage got nominated for "Worst onscreen couple"
#16963 +(308)- [X]<Evilmonkey> I SWEAR TO GOD IT WAS MY MOM NOT MY DAD..

<Evilmonkey> i wouldnt dream about my dad.. im not gay.. er.. ♥♥♥♥.
#22253 +(482)- [X]<error[dw]> you are a SICK SICK MAN

<GuyIncognito> It's delicious.  Can only find it in Philadelphia/Delaware area.

<GuyIncognito> About two years back, they ACTUALLY HAD ON THE LABEL of Hormel Scrapple "No pig anus!"

<AvatarADV> Man, how poor do you have to be to voluntarily eat something that has "no pig anus!" on the label and consider it a selling point?
#30264 +(281)- [X]* Ricyn watches the wind knock someone over outside

<Jedah> don't ya love hurricanes?

* Ricyn checks weatherbug.

<Ricyn> 60mph gusts

<Jedah> this sounds like a fun time to parasail

<Ricyn> yeah, just run into the street and jump
#31233 +(467)- [X](ori) I just watched the movie "Malcolm X"!!

(ori) but I have a question

(ori) What happend to the other nine malcolm movies?
#34267 +(190)- [X]<niko> whenever I see a korean media company or game company it's like

<niko> "HEY LOOK WE CAN DO ANIME TOO! AND GAMES WOO CHECK US OUT!"

<niko> "see you don't need japan!"

<niko> "you can use us! and we work cheaper!"
#38322 +(38)- [X]<daenonok> yea, but keep in mind when you're talking to d4n you're talking to someone so poor

<daenonok> he used to steal five dollars worth of caps (like for cap guns)

<daenonok> empty the power into a paper towel, wrap it up and light it

<daenonok> and that was his 4th of july
#42598 +(214)- [X]<Aussiedog> lol you know what happend in myers the otherday

<Aussiedog> i was in there and i go.. wow this is a cool cd, *talks to shopkeeper* hey what is this cd

<Aussiedog> she gives me it and asks me if i am interested in buying

<Aussiedog> and i go nar.. i just wanna kniow what songs are on it so i can download them

<Aussiedog> she was so pissed
#42666 +(16)- [X]<MrSaturn> AHHHHHHHHHh

<MrSaturn> it blew up in a freak accident

<MrSaturn> i must restard my computer is on fire

<MrSaturn> AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

* MrSaturn has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)

<poik007> seems funny
#53382 +(34)- [X]<nuance> er s/./,

<cherub> don't forget to s/0,5/0.5/!

<nuance> regexp nazi

<cherub> s/nazi/victim/
#54365 +(403)- [X]<default> say something nice to my mom if your around

<magpie> who's your mom

<magpie> that lady chainded up in the closet

<default> no the women looking over my shoulder
#56879 +(1508)- [X]<CuZZa> i lived there for a month

<CuZZa> japan is great

<CuZZa> really ♥♥♥♥♥♥ up, but great

<CuZZa> its weird. me being a 6'4 white guy standing on a train with a bunch of japanese people who are around 5'

<CuZZa> i had a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ guy dressed as sailor moon looking at me as if I was the weirdo
#69861 +(577)- [X]<adm> i should run for office

<adm> and my slogan will be this

<adm> "I DON'T CARE AT ALL ABOUT ANY OF YOUR PROBLEMS! :D"

<adm> with the smiley and everything

<ryu829> hey i cant log in through mirc

<adm> I DON'T CARE! :D
#71897 +(328)- [X]* iMac therefore iSuck *
#88272 +(210)- [X]<eye-dee-ten-tee> is this kazaa an indian program??

<eye-dee-ten-tee> I mean the name sounds like something from arabia

<Moo> Yeah.. president of Afghanistan, Hamid Kazaa
#89181 +(1334)- [X]<@MCJ> there was a little piece of soap left in the shower

<@MCJ> about the size of a credit card

<@MCJ> so i ran it through my butt crack making beep beep noises
#101689 +(1145)- [X]<@Pr|cK> oi shan on sunday last week at footlocker when i was buying new shoes

<@Pr|cK> there was this REALLY HOT chick working there right

<@Pr|cK> anyway i went in to buy shoes, and she saw my $500 sunnies

<@Pr|cK> and she gave me her number

<@cray> pfft that's nothing...i went into this shop and waved around my expensive gun, and the chick behind the counter gave me all her money
#123920 +(334)- [X]<Donut[AFK]> .. this is my new pickup line.

<@Meikai> Twitch.

<Donut[AFK]> "Hey, did I mention I have a single ♥♥♥♥, and that it is of average size and shape?"

<Donut[AFK]> "Also, I have no STDs!"

<@Meikai> "Because I never get laid!"
#138542 +(84)- [X]*** O_T_T_E_R Joined #warez/chat

«( cAz )»: sup otter

«( Mark )»: lol

«( Mark )»: you both go to the same university?

«( cAz )»: yeah

«( cAz )»: hes like 2 feet away from me

«( Mark )»: so u still talk on irc?

«( cAz )»: no he wants warez too

«( Elf )» university students trading illegal content.. dont they teach you guys the different between right and wrong in school? :p

«( Mark )»: im going to report you casey j and justin for trading illegal content at a university

«(@ deTh[aWay] )»: mark

«(@ deTh[aWay] )»: you're sitting in a warez channel and threatening to report people for it

«( Mark )»: sure

«( cAz )»: lol you noticed that too huh?

«( Mark )»: im here for the chat

«( Mark )»: not for the warez

«( Mark )»: ;)
#145562 +(318)- [X]<RageFury|Work> Like just 2 days ago I casually dropped some Jalapeno into the can of Alpo Cat food I set out for the kitten.

<RageFury|Work> Freaking bastard tried to claw my pants.
#150655 +(788)- [X]<cvd> fscking Cisco 3.0 material is in Engrish or some ♥♥♥♥

<cvd> It's hard to study ♥♥♥♥ when they can't even write a complete sentence

<Macolio> super happy 100% network failure occurance!
#165606 +(220)- [X]<GimpyMcsquibble>I wonder if there have ever been 2 30 yr"