"#648 +(1238)- [X]<snerfu> I would say the worst feeling is waking up after a night of drunken stupor and in the process of walking to your computer all you see is a pine session that says: your email "im drunk" has been sent.
#1813 +(518)- [X]<doobedoobedoo> Arlaswecryfhrljarufvvutuutwdd

<doobedoobedoo> You know what's funny?

<doobedoobedoo> That's probably a word in welsh.
#3224 +(741)- [X]<phish> wow, I read this in a slashdot post "Stop slouching! It's two O'clock in the afternoon, PUT PANTS ON!" and immediately thought...damn, he's right

<phish> ...now I just need to find my pants
#5638 +(363)- [X]<Krispy> you could double specialize

<Krispy> GYN/PROCTOLOGY

<Krispy> THEN YOU COULD DO THE SHOCKER

<Krispy> AND IT WOULD BE ALL LEGAL
#6248 +(53)- [X]<elroyk> i like to look at pictures of me then, because I get to think "wow, I am really a lot hotter now"
#7794 +(808)- [X]<RighteousSuicide> I was running around today like a ♥♥♥♥♥♥

<RighteousSuicide> and I hear a BANG

<RighteousSuicide> i couldn't figure out what it was

<RighteousSuicide> then I noticed I had run into a dumpster
#8143 +(130)- [X]<Bieeardo> GURPS!

<Bieeardo> It's not just for bodily noise jokes, anymore!
#8310 +(274)- [X]<kat-write> disturb me and suffer castration

<Doppelganger> that almost sounded interesting till I remembered what that meant
#9596 +(410)- [X]<@PikaChan> the four greatest numbers in existance: 13, 69, 666, 1337

<@PikaChan> man, it'd be cool to have the phone number 1-337-666-1369

<%ragna> pika, you thought long and hard about that didnt you?

<@PikaChan> yes i did
#10489 +(98)- [X]<deimos> what are you installing?

<hep> your mom

<hep> YourMom v.2.4.5

<deimos> wow

<deimos> yourmom kept panicing on me

<hep> she does that deimos
#10504 +(-5)- [X]<jej> i want to get down lower than atlantis.
#10953 +(428)- [X]<hoche> you know, qdb mostly reminds me that none of us are as witty as oscar wilde
#14343 +(427)- [X]<Paveourroads> in a multiplayer game, you can be all, "Look, I have cooler ♥♥♥♥ than you." in a singleplayer game, you're like, "OK, my stuff is cool." and you show people who come over to your house and they're like, "You're a loser." so you cry and die. >:(
#17262 +(189)- [X]<RatBreath> my joystick still wont work

<NickBlasta> take breaks between fapping
#17539 +(124)- [X]<Chronosla> RARs are the dingleberries of Satan, sent to torment me with mockery and derision.
#21899 +(215)- [X]<MrSatan> gordon>you thecms "logo2 that you drew that gets used on everything?

<gordon> eh?!

<ManInBlac> <MrSatan> gordon> you know the CMS "logo" that you drew, that gets used on everything?

<ManInBlac> got to love the MrSatan -> English translator on AltaVista  
#36382 +(-53)- [X]::: Mode: (@agg) sets (+m)

[@agg]: say nothing if ur gay !!!!!!!
#37109 +(55)- [X]* time stamps have been retained to aid in the understanding and comedy of the quote...



[18:23:03] *** NoneX (Harry@64.229.188.165) has joined channel #php

[18:23:05] <greg_oc> Channel Warning: NoneX detected in #kiddiesex

[18:23:10] *** NoneX has left #php
#38413 +(910)- [X]<DooMStalK> I was bored, and called 1-800-COW-♥♥♥♥ once, only to find out COW and BOY take up the same numbers on the phone
#41743 +(203)- [X]<+aisha-fan> dude

<+aisha-fan> my moms boss brougt in a "new" penteium I

<+aisha-fan> those things r so old their obsoleet

<@MewMew[WC3]> As is correct spelling, I presume.
#50158 +(151)- [X]<rising> wow this room is full of losers

<Bored_Catboy> rising, your on IRC....
#50735 +(303)- [X]<sleeper> I wonder if it would be illegal to take scans of a magazine from 1960 and sell them

<sleeper> I figure it must be....but is it?

<Sku> has to be older then that to be legal fer sure

<sleeper> you're sure that isn't public domain by now?

<ZeroHour> no sleeper, PlayBoy is still in business

<ZeroHour> lol

<sleeper> how'd you know it was playboy?
#52501 +(312)- [X]<Graphic_V> Remember when you turned 18 and you could finally start looking at those naked people on the internet?
#57443 +(109)- [X]<Yaleman> omg.. you should see a netsplit / join on a warez channel with over 3000 people in it... intense

<Yaleman> OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

<Yaleman> it's like a rollercoaster ride man
#58770 +(166)- [X]* wintax accidentally substitutes tequila for olive oil while trying to make salad dressing
#58910 +(205)- [X]<+DangerMan> I liked cold weather a lot better when I was fat

<bmwii> ya, an extra 30 pounds helps through the winter =)

<+ZombiEater> ..or a jacket
#75383 +(203)- [X]<Dilbert_>  is a pregnancy test kit, in bad taste as a bday present?
#76047 +(290)- [X]<@Neurowave> YOU!

<@Neurowave> DOWNLOAD!

<@Neurowave> ALL!

<@Neurowave> SONGS

<@Neurowave> THEN

<@Neurowave> LISTEN

<@Neurowave> NOW

<spacer> ALL YOUR CAPS ARE BELONG TO US!

<sEnDarK> that sentence is not gramatically correct, its "all your caps belong to us"
#77387 +(209)- [X]<Patrick> my mom just gave me 10 more dollars

<Patrick> i feel like saying

<Patrick> "thanks for supporting my drinking habit mom"
#80242 +(158)- [X]Dekaff: u know what i REALLY want for my first car?

Dekaff: blue 67 impala

Bobert_aw: The license plate would read "mu113tm0bi13"
#80285 +(292)- [X]<mike90210> shou

<Shou> mike90210

<GLC> hey... symmetry!

<GLC> god I'm bored
#81020 +(237)- [X]<xShaitanx> does anyone have yahoo msgner cause this chick is dpoing something with dildos u wana see

<cvz> she using them to make a cake ?
#139697 +(9133)- [X]<frank> can you help me install GTA3?

<knightmare> first, shut down all programs you aren't using

frank has quit IRC. (Quit)

<knightmare> ...
#164986 +(1009)- [X]<mikeD> ya i got into a fight im so pissed....

<abrutii> well... did you win?

<mikeD> no but i got a good hit in

<abrutii> ya? thats good, where did you hit him?

<mikeD> i hit his hand with my eye

<abrutii> lmfao
#215067 +(582)- [X]<JtotheB> and i think i need to start wearing pants when i climb that tree in your yard

<Shiv_DFA> you found the boobytraps, did you?

<JtotheB> i got a shuriken in my scrotum

<JtotheB> you tell me
#241223 +(407)- [X]<c41yp50> "If elected, Kerry will appoint Captain Planet as secretary of defense, but the military will crumble when everyone realizes how stupid the power of heart is."
#258240 +(1275)- [X]<@cs_weasel> my latest viagra spam subject line: "adolph"

< ponds`zombie> ein reich, ein volk, ein schlongpill
#258768 +(627)- [X]<+flash> WHER CAN I DOWNLOAD A VIRUS?THAT KILLS MY PC FOR FREE?

<Server> flash: www.windowsupdate.com
#402959 +(337)- [X]Hyp3rHax0r: they say office romances never work out

Hyp3rHax0r: they're probably right

Hyp3rHax0r: what kind of weirdo falls in love with an office?
#445396 +(466)- [X][ Stryker  ) OMGZ ASLZ

[ Stryker  ) ^_^

[ AnFguy   ) omg like

[ AnFguy   ) 14/f/naked

[ Stryker  ) omg like

[ Stryker  ) 13/f/OMG

[ Stryker  ) w/ pix ^_^

[ AnFguy   ) pix u say>

[ AnFguy   ) we should do tradsies

[ Stryker  ) omgz you have piz too?!?!

[ Stryker  ) HERE_THEY_ARE_JPG.EXE
#466105 +(948)- [X]Spanky: dude...there's a guy with the aim SN "themormonjihad"

TyFlame: rofl

Spanky: what the ♥♥♥♥

TyFlame: conquering the world, one wife at a time
#469543 +(1120)- [X]<tanuki> FunkyMonkey: I have a friend who tried ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ out of a tree stand while hunting

<tanuki> he dropped his coveralls, hung his ass over the side, and let fly... but when he was done, he went to zip up the coveralls, flipped the hood up...

<tanuki> *thwack*

<tanuki> he ended up ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ in the hood of his coveralls without"