小岩井四叶实名上网's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2022 @ 5:09pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 16 Feb @ 7:42am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 15 Feb @ 6:04am

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2022 @ 4:40pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2022 @ 2:16am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 15 Feb @ 7:38am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 15 Feb @ 9:07am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 18 Feb @ 5:29am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 18 Feb @ 8:37pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 29 Feb @ 9:47am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 7 Jun @ 4:14am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 16 Feb @ 7:21am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 15 Feb @ 9:03am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 15 Feb @ 7:09am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 25 Apr @ 11:31pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 29 Feb @ 9:38am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 16 Feb @ 8:04am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 12 Apr @ 5:31pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 15 Feb @ 6:04am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 16 Feb @ 8:13am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 27 Jan @ 6:15am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 27 Apr @ 6:41pm

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 26 Jul @ 9:27pm

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 7 Jun @ 4:44am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 18 Feb @ 8:25pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2022 @ 2:20am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2022 @ 4:47am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 18 Feb @ 5:15am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 18 Feb @ 6:01am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 23 Jun @ 5:59am

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 15 Feb @ 8:13am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 18 Feb @ 8:44am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 26 Apr @ 7:46pm

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 15 Feb @ 9:11am

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.

Unlocked 24 Jul @ 1:19am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 26 Jul @ 9:27pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 15 Mar @ 11:00am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 12 Apr @ 8:18am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 27 Apr @ 6:51pm

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 7 Jun @ 4:42am

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 27 Apr @ 6:29pm

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

Unlocked 22 Mar @ 11:53am

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

Unlocked 15 Mar @ 10:43am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 29 Feb @ 9:31am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

1 / 30

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

19 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

7 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 30

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

17 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

675 / 5,000