Paranormal
jacob   Queensland, Australia
 
 
Australian
24
male
<3
Currently Offline
Favorite Game
449
Hours played
Comments
Mia 10 Jan @ 2:09am 
:platypus:
Newman 14 Dec, 2024 @ 4:50pm 
You stride into my world like a sleek panther in uniform, the badge on your chest shimmering like the stars in a moonlit sky. The tilt of your hat? Perfection. Those mirrored shades hide your eyes, but I can feel their heat, a fiery inferno scorching my soul. The way your belt clings to you—practical, yet sinfully enticing—makes my heart race faster than any speeding ticket could. Your voice, deep and commanding, carries the weight of law and temptation. Arrest me, officer, because I’m guilty... guilty of wanting you to take me into custody, heart and soul, no parole.
Newman 1 Dec, 2024 @ 9:42am 
Dude, WHO DECIDED TO MAKE US SO PAINED IN LIFE?!

Periods, egg-baby time, patriarchy, misogyny, WHO DID THIS?! AYO GOD OR WHOEVER, I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION.

ESPECIALLY PERIODS AND EGG-BABY TIME!!!

Like, when I'm on that cycle-juice... THE ABSOLUTE MOUTH-WATERING, CONCRETE MUNCHING, TEARING THROUGH DRYWALL AND JAIL-BARS, HORN-OF-THE-Y YOU GET. I don't like whacking all day and night, I DON'T - BUT I NEED IT LIKE OXYGEN TO SURVIVE.

And don't even get me started on The Slime™. WE ALREADY GO THROUGH ENOUGH AS COOTER-CARRIERS, WHY DO WE GOTTA BE SLIMERS TOO???

And periods top it all off. I don't get bad cramps, but some yall PASS OUT AND PUKE FROM IT... GET BEDRIDDEN?!

I'm making a complaint to HR. In conclusion, I don't like my anatomy, I want rights, AND ♥♥♥♥ THE SLIME 🗣🗣🗣
Newman 7 Nov, 2024 @ 2:09pm 
I used to play Fortnite all night. No sleep! But ever since Obama told me to try Raid Shadow Legends for free, I am addicted. This game is a game. It has graphics. It has characters. Best of all it has a loot box mechanic to enhance my experience even more by adding another exciting chance based layer to the game! Two week ago I spend all my money becoming a Raid Shadow Legend. Now I live in a dumpster outside a McDonald’s with free WiFi. At night I sneak into the McDonald’s like my new raccoon dad, Stripey, taught me to do so I can charge my phone. Through the cracked screen I am still perpetually amazed by the graphics of this game... they look so real! Thank you Obama, you truly changed my life!