⠀⠀   ⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀     ⣀⣀
⠀⡴⠚⠛⠲⣤⠞⠁⠈⠙⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⡷⠛⢳⠀
⢸⡇      ⣹⠀    ⣇⣀⣀⣀⠜⠀
⠈⢇     ⢀⡟⠋⠉⠙⠳⣄⠴⠛⠋⠋⠛⣷⡄
⠀⠈⢦⡀   ⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀⠀⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡆ ㅤㅤ
⠀⠀⠀⠙⠦⣀⣀⣠⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡇
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠃
  ⣀⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋
⠀⠀⣠⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⣆
⠀⣴⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣶⠦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠾⠷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣧⡀
⢠⣿⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠤⠞⠢⠄⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⢹⡆
⢸⣇⡠⠚⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠳⣄⠀⠀⢠⠞⠉⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠳⣄⢸⡇
⣀⣿⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣸⣀⣀⣇⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣸

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How to eat M&Ms
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the “loser,” and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

TOUCHING GRASS IS OVERRATED!!!!!!
but theoretically what if, instead of touching grass, i were to eat it? i understand people tell me to “touch grass 🤓” but what if i’m hungry? what if i don’t wanna touch it but i wanna just dig up a bit of dirt with grass growing out of it and eat it like a slice of cake? would that count as touching grass? the dirt just serves as a good crunch in the tart taste of the grass and pesticide 🤤 the next time someone online tells me to touch grass i’m going outside and cutting myself a slice of grass and eating it on video and sending it to them

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠻⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠇⠀⢀⣴⣶⡾⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⣀⣀⣸⡿⠀⠀⢸⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⣾⡟⠛⣿⡇⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀
⢀⣿⠀⢀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⢴⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣆
⢸⣿⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⣀⣠⣴⣾⣮⣝⠿⠿⠿⣻⡟
⢸⣿⠀⠘⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠉⠀
⠸⣿⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠻⣷⣶⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⢠⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣛⣛⣻⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣀⣀⣀⣼⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⡿

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