i ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ love getting likes on instagram. i remember each person who likes my post individually and they all send a different sensation through my body. its so addictive, its like theyre fondling and teasing me letting me know that they love me. you wouldnt get it though.

Listen, One time i used a straight razer to clear up my boing loing, i ended up bleeding and found out it was the worst idea ever, then i asked myself, why isnt there a barber for these types of things? How cool would it be to have a fade on my balls? I just want a fade on my balls man

i want him to sit on my face and slap my cheeks with his asscheeks until my face turns purple then I want him to jump onto me and smash my teeth in with his bare feet, choking me and gagging me with his foot in my mouth, making me his loyal servant

Hello! I noticed you have an avatar of a very beautiful (but also intelligent looking!) female, and I am under the presumption that this goddess resembles you? It is quite astonishing to see a famale here in the cringetopia subreddit! I am quite popular around here in this sub, so if you require and guideance, please, throw me a mention. I will assist you at any hour, day or night. And, before you are mistaken, I do not seek your hand in a romantic way; although, I am not opposed in the event you are interested in me, as many women often are. I am a man of standard, and I do not bow to just any female that comes my way, unlike my peers... So rest assued that I will not be in the way of your gaming and socializing experience. Consider me a Player 2.. a companion, a partner, and perhaps we can enjoy some video games together some time!

YO YO YO listen up to my new rap! I just got a freddy hat!

(HOT GIRL SINGING) oH YeAhhhh ITS FREDDY FAZBEARS PIZZA! WHEN YOU GET SOME PIZZA! AND A BIG. PIECE. OF ASSSSSS! awesome music plays

Me: ya my name is rappa 3000 and ill tel ya da story of fredy pizzaria with a freddy goldy and a hot foxy ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ chica all day long, With a hudge dong, and den the security guard named chonged put his dong in BONNIE!

girl takes off shirt and sings OH YEAAAAAAHHH ITS FREDDY FAZBER PIZZZAAA! WHEN U GET SOME PIZZA AND A. BIG. PIECE. OF. QSS

me strokes dong mmmm ya its fredy fazber pizza with huge dings and blongs and bongs and frogsssss! with scary sexy animatrons!

At the end of Endgame Thanos agrees to undo everything he's done if the Avengers can beat him in a penis measuring contest, but none of the avengers even come close. Even the Hulk is shorter than Thanos by a noticeable amount, and their girth isn't even comparable. That's when, at the last moment, Captain Marvel pulls down her pants and unleashes the phattest hawg the universe has ever seen. Shamed by her immense size, Thanos undoes all that he has done, and then commits Japanese ritual suicide. He is buried in an unmarked grave in Area 51