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used to, and half the time they aren't even fit to drink.
😯
Bride, n.:
A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
🙁
Peter: [singing] Lois makes me take the rap/'Cause our check book looks like crap/Since I can't give her a slap/I need a Jew.
😫
When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
🤤
You will be a winner today. Pick a fight with a four-year-old.
🤕
Your good nature will bring you unbounded happiness.
😙
Without ice cream life and fame are meaningless.
😭
Wanna tell you all a story 'bout a man named Jed,
A poor mountaineer, barely kept his family fed.
But then one day he was shootin' at some food,
When up through the ground come a bubblin' crude -- oil, that is;
black gold; 'Texas tea' ..